How to Reconnect With Your Higher Self

Last Updated: March 20, 2023 Fact Checked

Have you ever felt you are so much more than your outer activity and current life seems to indicate? Have you ever had the sense that inside of you somewhere is this great being of Light and power? That you had a deeper purpose? If so, then you already have an awareness of the wonderful being of Light that you truly are - your Real/Higher Self! By reconnecting with your Higher/True Self, you will experience more joy, happiness, peace and abundance!

Steps

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Before you can delve into such a sacred undertaking as connecting with your higher self, you must connect with your lower self. We all share the same lower self, and that is Mother Earth. You cannot reach Her via meditation but rather by being joyous, playful and truly becoming a kid again. You will know when you have made the connection because you will never feel safer or more exuberant than when that time comes. If this first step isn't completed, the journey to connecting with the higher self becomes virtually impossible.
Forgive yourself and others. Do not hold on to the past. Realize that you don't have to "forgive and forget". You can still acknowledge that you or someone else did something "wrong" while at the same time forgiving. Non-forgiveness binds you energetically to the other person and your lower self/ego.^[1]
Write down every time you engage in bad habits and negative energy (such as anger, doubt, fear, worry, discouragement, resentment, etc.) At the end of the evaluation, list what you consider to be your worst habits and momentum. Then resolve to go after them one by one and overcome them! Awareness begins the undoing - intention, determination and focus continues the dissolving of bad habits and negative momentum.
We all pick up limiting, false beliefs along the way which keep us from being all we can be. Those beliefs can even cause pain and suffering. Resolve to really look at the things you believe in and WHY you have the belief. Realize that no one is forcing you to believe anything and that beliefs are NOT a part of who you really are! Determine to keep an open mind and know that limiting beliefs are keeping you from fully connecting with your True Self. Clearly see that false beliefs are restricting you from experiencing all the goodness of life, as well as contributing to suffering and a sense of struggle in life. Determine to let them go!
Developing and maintaining positive momentum is essential on the spiritual path and will help you reconnect more fully with your Higher Self. Each day focus on one positive momentum you would like to work on and commit to integrating it throughout the day. For example: keeping your harmony, being more joyful, helping others, etc.^[2]
As you go through your day, regularly express your gratefulness for everything you can think of - the wonderful day, the beautiful flowers, the sunshine, your spouse, the smile on your child's face, your family's health, and on and on. Let gratitude fill your heart and you'll be surprised to see what a difference this will make! Gratefulness opens the doorway to your True Self.^[3]
Harmony is one of the major keys - if not THE major key - on the path to raising your consciousness and reuniting with your Higher Self. Harmony is an internal quality springing from the heart and not just an external expression. Harmony involves mastering your emotions and not letting them control you. State your clear intention to be centered in Harmony and to be harmonious in every situation you meet. Keep centered in the heart as much as possible and focus on peace and harmony.
Reacting negatively to situations destroys harmony. Realize that in every situation you can choose to react in a positive way or a negative way - that's up to you. There is always a split second before you react to something where you DO have a choice. Even if you react in a negative way initially, you have the choice to continue to react and revolve the situation, or to let it go! Diffuse a negative reaction by centering in your heart and breathing deeply. This will help connect you with your Higher Self.
Neutral is a powerful state of emotional balance and inner quiet and peace. It is a place of equilibrium where you are more able to access the wisdom of your Higher Self. Learning to stay neutral is a key to becoming non-reactive to situations. Being neutral is not a state of not feeling anything, but rather a state where you are in balance with your emotional responses to what is happening - neither reacting negatively or becoming overly excited.
Live in the moment. Much of suffering comes from not living in the now. Our minds are unbelievably powerful when focused, but most of that power is lost by not living in the moment. The Present is where your power is! Most importantly, you can only connect with your Higher Self when you are in the present. Learn to let go of the past, projecting into the future, worrying and anything else that takes you away from the present moment. Peace is in the now!^[4]
One of the most important things we can do to reconnect with our Higher Self is to surrender - let go of that which causes us pain, suffering, unhappiness, and limitation. As long as we are primarily operating from our lower self/ego, we are unfortunately tying ourselves to those very things. When negative emotions arise, the key is to immediately surrender them to God/the Universal. If you find yourself reluctant to surrender something or find you are still revolving the same thing over and over along with the negative emotions, you need to ask yourself why - what is the payoff? What is the "juice" the lower self is feeding on? ("poor me", "look how I was wronged", etc.) Realize that whatever the ego is holding on to, it will continue to cause you grief and suffering until you are willing to surrender it completely! Remember - you have a choice - to continue to hold on to negative emotions and suffering - or to surrender them and as a result, find more happiness and peace in your life.
Realize that we cannot control everything and the events in our life through the human self. Sometimes it is necessary to "let go and let God". Letting go involves surrendering yourself (and your ego!) to a higher force, and the ego does not like that at all. As you connect more and more to your Higher Self, surrendering and letting go becomes less difficult. Letting go also means surrendering fears, worries and insecurities and trusting God/the Universal that everything will work out.^[5]
Meditate. Meditation is essential on the spiritual path. If you are to connect with your Higher Self, you must be able to still the mind through meditation. Through that inner quietness, you can then learn to listen to the "still, small voice within" of your True Self. Meditation is a key which can open the door to higher perception, unlocking the perfect wisdom in your very own heart! Through quieting the mind and focusing your attention, you will allow your own innate inner wisdom to flow into your awareness.^[6]

Expert Q&A

Question
How do I talk to my higher self?
Jennifer McVey, Cht
Spiritual Director
Expert Answer
The best way to get in touch with your higher self involves one rule: always ask yourself first. Ask, ask, ask, and then be aware and open to the answers. The more you get used to looking for answers or healing from yourself, the better you'll be able to communicate. Your higher self is always going to stay with you—we're often just too busy to hear it.
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Overcoming Resistance: Resistance is a common occurrence to change and as you embark on the path to reuniting with your Higher Self, there will of course be changes that need to occur. Even if we are really interested in making changes in our lives, there is a natural tendency in human nature to resist change - at least initially. So be aware (but do not get discouraged!), that you will encounter various resistances to your application - both external and internal. Clear intention and determination will help you overcome resistance.
Fighting the Ego Trap: Many spiritual seekers falsely believe the ego is "bad" and that we need to fight it. That is a trap. The thing is to see the ego as merely a temporary attachment and NOT your Real Self. Until we are more firmly connected to our Higher Self, most people identify "me" as their ego, so if they end up fighting it, it feels like they are fighting themselves! The key is to surrender the attachment to the ego and cultivate reconnecting more fully with the Higher Self. In that way, there is no need to fight it and the ego will eventually relinquish control and the lower self will dissolve into the Higher Self.
Application is Everything: Many spiritual seekers, including those wanting to know and more fully connect with their Higher Self, are initially motivated because they are unhappy with their lives and the circumstances they find themselves in. First and foremost - if you want your life to change, YOU must change! You MUST have an intense desire and determination to APPLY the needed steps and follow through with that application on a daily basis!

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