Momma and the Meaning of Life: Tales of Psychotherapy Paperback – 28 July 2020
by Irvin D Yalom M.D. (Author)
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Bestselling author of Love's Executioner and The Gift of Therapy, psychotherapist Irvin D. Yalom probes further into the mysteries of the therapeutic encounter in this entertaining and thoughtful collection.
In six enthralling stories drawn from his own clinical experience, Irvin D. Yalom once again proves himself an intrepid explorer of the human psyche as he guides his patients--and himself--toward transformation. With eloquent detail and sharp-eyed observation Yalom introduces us to a memorable cast of characters. Drifting through his dreams and trampling through his thoughts are
- Paula, Yalom's courtesan of death;
- Myrna, whose eavesdropping gives new meaning to patient confidentiality;
- Magnolia, into whose ample lap Yalom longs to pour his own sorrows, even as he strives to ease hers; and
- Momma--ill-tempered, overpowering, and suffocating her son with both love and disapproval.
A richly rewarding, almost illicit glimpse into the therapist's heart and mind, Momma and the Meaning of Life illuminates the unique potential of every human relationship.
272 pages
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Review
"These spellbinding tales of pain and of healing transport us into the very core of the therapeutic experience." -- Maggie Scarf, author of Intimate Worlds
“This is a chance to get inside the mind of a brilliant therapist and witness the soul breaking through. Like the first light of dawn, Momma and the Meaning of Life is warm, radiant and revealing.” -- Mark Epstein, M.D., author of Thoughts Without a Thinker and Going to Pieces Without Falling Apart
"Unlike most psychotherapists, Yalom can tell a story and tell it so well that it is easy to forget that what one is reading is a distillation of weeks, months, even years of therapeutic work. . . . And Yalom does it with enviable openness and style." -- Times Literary Supplement (London)
"Yalom absorbingly recounts the resilience some patients bring to the task of healing themselves." -- Booklist
"[Yalom] again displays the great narrative drive and wit evident in Love's Executioner. . . . These six engrossing narratives are very valuable gleanings from a master therapist's professional and personal experience. -- Kirkus
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About the Author
Irvin D. Yalom, M.D., is the author of The Schopenhauer Cure, Lying on the Couch, Every Day Gets a Little Closer, and Love's Executioner, as well as several classic textbooks on psychotherapy. When Nietzsche Wept was a bestseller in Germany, Israel, Greece, Turkey, Argentina, and Brazil with millions of copies sold worldwide. Yalom is Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry at Stanford University, and he divides his practice between Palo Alto, where he lives, and San Francisco, California.
About the Author
Irvin D. Yalom, M.D., is the author of The Schopenhauer Cure, Lying on the Couch, Every Day Gets a Little Closer, and Love's Executioner, as well as several classic textbooks on psychotherapy. When Nietzsche Wept was a bestseller in Germany, Israel, Greece, Turkey, Argentina, and Brazil with millions of copies sold worldwide. Yalom is Professor Emeritus of Psychiatry at Stanford University, and he divides his practice between Palo Alto, where he lives, and San Francisco, California.
==
Momma and the Meaning of Life: Tales of Psychotherapy
Irvin D. Yalom
4.06
7,953 ratings501 reviews
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272 pages, Paperback
First published August 1, 1999
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November 29, 2018
This book was unexpectedly added to the list of my favorite books, even though I was hesitant to read it at first.
I have a friend who has read most of Yalom's books, and I always thought that they must be very heavy and complicated books, which is not the case at all.
The book consists of a collection of 6 real and imaginary stories of the author's experiences, which are narrated in a very artistic way and have a strange effect on the reader.
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Petra meeting Mr Darcy Thur no pride or prejudice!
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This is my favourite book by Dr. Irv Yalom. He is a wonderful writer and teller of stories, but there are many books I enjoy for those reasons, what distinguishes this author? I enjoy reading Dr. Yalom because of the philosophical elements he wraps around the real-life stories of his patients. He makes their problems not only easily understandable, but you sympathise, you identify with their angst.
Each chapter is a story of therapy that begins with his identification with his patient as being-all-of-us-in-it-together and ends with the solving of an existential problem and an easing, if not a cure, of the problem that led the person to Yalom in the first place. He doesn't promise cures, his role is to help the person see clearly their problem and how they can move forward from it. He listens and brings himself and his life to his patients and his books.
One of the reasons I like Yalom so much is that he makes sense. He addresses issues that we all will have to confront in our lives. As an existentialist he doesn't hark back to the dark meanderings of Freud or the archetypes of Jung. He deals with the here-and-now, the as-we-are. Contrasting with him is another modern therapist, Dr. M. Scott Peck, another story-telling author, but one who analyses people and their problems from a spiritual point of view, specifically from a strongly Christian viewpoint. He firmly believes in the existence of evil and the devil. His last book dealt with an exorcism he performed which has to be unique among practising psychiatrists.
I believe that from a viewpoint in the distant future, we will probably look back on today's religions as quaint and interesting myths and folklore, much as we do the various Egyptian, Roman and Greek cults, but the existential problems will still be with us in the same ways as they are today. Birth, death, love, children, friendship, hatred, disease and lack of resources will always be sources of problems. The insights gained from reading Yalom's talk solutions to his patients' problems are equally timeless and universal and that's why I like reading his books so much.
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Momma and the Meaning of Life, Irvin D. Yalom
Psychotherapist Irvin D. Yalom probes further into the mysteries of the therapeutic encounter in this entertaining and thoughtful follow-up to his bestselling Love's Executioner
In six enthralling stories drawn from his own clinical experience, Irvin D. Yalom once again proves himself an intrepid explorer of the human psyche as he guides his patients--and himself--toward transformation.
With eloquent detail and sharp-eyed observation Yalom introduces us to a memorable cast of characters.
Drifting through his dreams and trampling through his thoughts are Paula, Yalom's "courtesan of death"; Myrna, whose eavesdropping gives new meaning to patient confidentiality; Magnolia, into whose ample lap Yalom longs to pour his own sorrows, even as he strives to ease hers; and Momma--ill-tempered, overpowering, and suffocating her son with both love and disapproval.
A richly rewarding, almost illicit glimpse into the therapist's heart and mind, Momma and the Meaning of Life illuminates the unique potential of every human relationship.
Titles published in Iran: "Mom and the meaning of life: psychotherapy stories"; "Mom and the meaning of life"; Author: Erwin D. Yalom; The date of the first reading is the 12th day of August 2011 AD
Title: Mom and the meaning of life: psychotherapy stories; Author: Erwin D. Yalom; Sepideh Habib translator; With an introduction by Jafar Bo-Elhari; Tehran, Karvan, 2016; on 342 pages; ISBN 9789648497939; second edition 2019; The third edition of 2010; 4th edition 2011; 6th edition 2012; Another edition of the drop publication, year 2012; ISBN 9786001192074; 13th edition of 2015; 26th edition 1400; The subject of psychological stories from the authors of the United States of America - 20th century
Title: Mom and the meaning of life: psychotherapy stories; Author Ervin D. Yalom; Saeed Nikmanesh translator; Tehran, Mossadegh, 2016; on 320 pages; ISBN 9786007436738;
Title: Mom and the meaning of life; Author Ervin D. Yalom; Translated by Masoumeh Abbasi Netaj-Omrani; Tehran, Navai Maktoob; 2019; on 272 pages; ISBN 9786008958291;
Title: Mom and the meaning of life; Author: Ervin D. Yalom; Translated by Samia Shahrabi Farahani; Editor Ahmadreza Mofarahnejad; Tehran, Nik Farjam, 1400, 311 pages; ISBN 9786222581251;
Nothing is as effective as a story in human life, a topic that "Irwin Yalom", the prominent writer and psychotherapist of the United States of America, has understood well; Based on his science, theories, and years of experience, "Yalum" has created short stories about the treatment of various people, which are included in the book "Mom and Meaning of Life"; Stories that show the ability of "Irvin Yalom" to convey psychological concepts in an attractive and readable format.
The book "Mom and the Meaning of Life, Psychotherapeutic Stories", six stories: "Mom and the Meaning of Life", "Hanging with Paula", "Southern Comfort", "Seven Advanced Lessons in Grief Therapy", "Double Dream" and "Cat Spell" are "Hungarians"; The first four stories were written based on reality, and the last two stories were written by "Ervin Yalom" based on his imagination; With these stories, the author expresses the surprises and challenges in the relationship between the patient and the therapist, which is also an achievement for psychology.
The first story is about the influence of the mother on the formation of the children's personality; In this story "Irvin Yalom" they depict the life of a writer who dreams of her mother after her death; This woman, who hated her mother, after ten years, her life is under her radius, and she says to herself: (Why should I wave at her now that I have lived in constant hostility with her for years? She is selfish, forbidden (He was intrusive, intrusive, suspicious, spiteful, extremely single-minded, and incredibly uninformed; I don't remember a single moment that I felt close to him).
Excerpt: (As a medical student, I learned the subtle art of looking, listening, and touching; I looked at red, inflamed throats, swollen eardrums and tortuous retinal arteries; mitral valve whistling, gurgling I listened to the intestines and the bad wheezing of the lungs; I touched the slippery edge of the liver and spleen, the hardness of the ovarian cysts and the cancerous prostate as hard as marble); The end
of the update date is 21/05/1400 AH; A. Sherbiani
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Children who are abused often find it difficult to separate from their dysfunctional families. While the children of good and kind parents distance themselves from them with less conflict. Isn't it one of the parents' duties to enable the child to leave home?
418
My mother and I, although we were in love, we never spoke openly from the bottom of our hearts like two people who do not feel guilty about each other. We had always "controlled" each other: we ran between words, each wanted to scare, control and deceive the other.
426
Living with death has its benefits. I know that although the truth (self) of death destroys us, the idea of death saves us. This is the ancient wisdom, that's why for centuries monks kept skulls in their cells. Montaigne ordered to live in a room overlooking the cemetery.
430
Those who fear death more than others are those who approach death with a large amount of unlived life.
436 What are
doctors like? Why don't they understand how important their honest and sincere presence is for the patient? Why don't they realize that at the very moment when they are no longer needed, they are needed more than ever?
449
I have learned that if there is a big issue between two people and they don't talk about it, they can't talk about any other important issue
462
The fear that a person experiences when he learns that he has a fatal disease is multiplied by the withdrawal of the people around him. The isolation of the dying patient is intensified by the foolish ways of those who try to hide the nearness of death. But death cannot be hidden. The signs are everywhere; Nurses chatter slowly, doctors pay attention to other parts of the body. Medical students tiptoe into a patient's room, family members bravely smile, and visitors feign cheerfulness.
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August 8, 2019
The book "Mother and the meaning of life" examines the points related to the treatment of bereavement in the form of a story, a non-specialist tone and with reference-oriented content, and even in this respect, Yalom shows off his existentialism.
In this book, Yalom introduces you to the mysterious world of a therapist's mind, where he introduces you to the vast conflicts that a therapist faces during the treatment of each client, sometimes less and sometimes more.
By introducing some real references and some imaginary references, the book raises a series of basic issues related to bereavement that I think every therapist needs to be aware of. Although Yalom himself focused on the issue of loss in this book, by reading this book and from Yalom's real and mental experiences, you will come across many other issues such as love, faith, religion, emptiness, attachment, parental effects and many other things. It is not without grace to pay attention to them.
Just as Yalom himself considers this book to be the mother of all his books, very simply, I think every therapist should read this book once and delve deep into the content of the stories so that the implicit concepts become clear to him and he can use it in his work.
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The lasting sentences of the book:
--------For everyone-- -------
There is no god in the trench. Christian God, Jewish God, Chinese God, any other God, finally a God is necessary! You can't fight without God.
...
I admit that religious faith is a powerful source of peace, and I will never weaken it until I have something better to replace it.
...
We are beings in search of meaning who have to cope with the trouble of being thrown into a world that is inherently meaningless.
...
Although the night comes early,
we have countless afternoons ahead of us.
...
If there is a way to the best, seeing the whole is the worst.
...
never get excited to know for whom the bells are tolling; They play for you.
...
--------For psychologists-----------
If you have nothing better to offer and replace, don't take away the patient's psychological defenses.
...
The treatment of the person you socialized with always turns out to be a mess. The best help I can do is to find and refer him to the most suitable therapist; Anyone who does not know this family.
...
Widows who had the best marriages go through the grieving and separation process more easily than those who had deep conflicts in their married life.
...
You can't throw the truth in your face: the only real truth is the truth we discover for ourselves.
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Recently I've been thinking a lot about Yalom's titular story in Love's Executioner, particularly this one line I keep circling back to: “Perhaps the function of the obsession was simply to provide intimacy: it bonded her to another—but not to a real person, to a fantasy.”
So wanting to bask again in the author's wisdom, I took the plunge and started Momma and the Meaning of Life. In six enthralling stories drawn from his own clinical experience, Irvin D. Yalom once again proves himself an intrepid explorer of the human psyche as he guides his patients--and himself--toward transformation. With eloquent detail and sharp-eyed observation Yalom introduces us to a memorable cast of characters. Drifting through his dreams and trampling through his thoughts are Paula, Yalom's "courtesan of death"; Myrna, whose eavesdropping gives new meaning to patient confidentiality; Magnolia, into whose ample lap Yalom longs to pour his own sorrows, even as he strives to ease hers; and Momma--ill-tempered, overpowering, and suffocating her son with both love and disapproval.
I knew I'd picked the right time to read this when it opened up with the titular story Momma and the Meaning of Life, recounting a dream of Irvin Yalom discussing with his late mother. Exploring dreams and the message behind them is my Achilles' heel. What took my breath away was their earnest conversation about motherhood by making him understand that his mother is human and him not seeing her as such by upholding too many unrealistic expectations is hurting both of them.
“The way I what? Go ahead. You started—say it—I know what you’re going to say.”
“What am I going to say?”
“No, Oyvin, you say it. If I tell you, you’ll change it.”
“It’s the way you don’t listen to me. The way you talk about things you don’t know anything about.”
“Listen to you? I don’t listen to you? Tell me, Oyvin, you listen to me? Do you know about me?”
“You’re right, Momma. Neither of us has been good at listening to the other.”
“Not me, Oyvin, I listened good. I listened to the silence every night when I came home from the store and you don’t bother to come upstairs from your study room. You don’t even say hello. You don’t ask me if I had a hard day. How could I listen when you didn’t talk to me?”
Oh, what last lines. She knows how to hold her argument; the final comment completely shifted my perspective.
And as I continued my reading of the tales in this collection, I came to realize that his grief for his mother lies at the heart of the following stories. The strong-willed women that followed, all with a formidable presence, left a lasting impact on me.
I took many notes of the conversations shared throughout my reading because it not only made me think and try to understand my own life, but certain phrases were “too important to me to be entrusted to memory.”
I think these stories are so readable and therapeutic to me because, as Yalom put it: “Perhaps they had benefited from spectator therapy: watching someone else work effectively in therapy often primes a patient for good therapeutic work in the future.”
As well as this line that captures it all: “Most of all, I had shown them that there is no such thing as a boring or empty patient—or group. Within every patient, and within every clinical situation, lies the chrysalis of a rich human drama. The art of psychotherapy lies in activating that drama.”
Each story, featuring a strong and multifaceted woman that reverberates off the page, had something show-stopping to say. From Paula's grandiose faith through her terminal illness in Travels with Paula (“I remember once telling you that a compromise cannot exist alone: it breeds, and before long you have lost what you most dearly believe.”), to Irene's grief-stricken state of loss and rage, where I took to heart her deeply specific point about connecting with people. I felt a little off-kilter in the best of ways when I read it:
“When I started seeing you, I was not going to take the risk of losing someone important to me again. I couldn’t go through that. So I had only two choices—”
As she so often did, Irene stopped, as though I should be able to divine the rest of her statement. Although I didn’t want to prompt her, it was best, for now, to keep the flow going.
“And those two choices were?”
“Well, not to let you matter to me—but that was impossible. Or not to see you as a real person with a narrative.”
“A narrative?”
“Yes, a life narrative—proceeding from a beginning to an end. I want to keep you outside of time.”
“Today, as usual, you walked into my office and straight to your chair, without looking at me. You always avoid my eyes. That what you mean by ‘outside of time’?”
She nodded. “Looking at you would make you too real.”
“And real people have to die.”
“Now you’ve got it.”
My head reeled. The point she made on holding eye contact struck a hidden chord in me. Really, truly, with all of my heart, I was awestruck that someone I'll never meet could describe something within me so precisely with one phrase. It's like this article conveyed, "where I fully understood the power of words and their ability to bring about a strange sort of comfort through shared experience."
It was worth saving this insightful, revealing, painful book to read at the right time, though, the hours passed all too quickly with this to consume. Of course, not all the stories were revolutionary, but each contained something wholesome and uniquely kind that made for a healing and enriching reading experience.
I do have to note, though, that the last two stories dissatisfied me in comparison to the preceding tales, mainly because it wasn't with Yalom as the therapist, rather a random (and fictional) Dr. Lash inserted with no prior introduction. The only thing that doctor made me realize was the fact that having Irvin D. Yalom in our story was a central point in the therapist-patient interactions. Before the out-of-nowhere insert of Dr. Lash, I was under the impression that the patients were the ones that made the story so worthy. But after reading Dr. Lash's average therapy with his patients, it made me appreciate and look at Yalom's approach through new eyes. Dr. Lash feels like the therapist you’d meet in real life, whereas Irvin D. Yalom is the one you want to read about in books; the therapist that challenges your thought process and goes out of his way to make sure you’re both on the same page. It just goes to show that sometimes you got to see the bad to know that the good is underappreciated. But it still threw me off that we didn't receive a warning that the story was fictional until the afterword at the very end. A little heads-up that we were about to explore “the boundary between fiction and nonfiction” would've been much appreciated before I got into the story feeling confused as to who this Ernest Lash was.
On a more positive note, the shortest tale talking to his mother's ghost in his dream and the longest tale describing Irene's raw grief and laments is where I feel this collection really flourishes. I got answers to a questions I didn't even know I had. It’s what I hoped Yalom's writing would evoke out of me, as it did in his previous collection. He has my everlasting admiration in the Nonfiction area.
Lastly, the central theme of disentangling dreams and trying to make sense of them through analyzing every corner was an added bonus for me.
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The book "Mom and the meaning of life" was a mediocre or even weak work by the famous Dr. Yalom. In my opinion, the book was confusing and did not convey the author's message or the purpose of writing the book to the reader. In this work, Dr. Yalom has tried to tell the reader his experiences in the form of a story. So, in fact, Mr. Palom is both a writer and a professor. He tries to express the concepts of psychology in a simple language for the reader, but in my opinion, the book cannot be a universal work, in fact, the book is suitable for the American and European audience who, when faced with mental problems, usually turn to a psychologist or psychiatrist. they go to the doctor, perhaps the best example is Anthony Soprano in the famous Soprano series, who goes to a psychologist to solve physical and mental problems, and the viewer can understand how the psychologist can find the roots of a person's past memories Find his fear and face them with the patient.
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May 12, 2021
I recommend this book to you.
For those of you who are afraid of death and death is a distant and terrible category for you.
You, who are people of helping, and you who come to see yourself don't know how to get help, you don't know how to let others help you.
I recommend this book to those of you who feel that you have a painful and unbreakable chain with your mother and this chain is only bothering you.
And I recommend it to those who enjoy looking inside.
Many people say that these books, which are the narration of psychotherapy stories, are not suitable for ordinary readers, but I disagree. I say that you don't have to be a client or a therapist to learn to relate, to empathize, to care, to listen and give feedback.
Every relationship we experience, every conversation we are in, needs some kind of help... help for the progress of that conversation, the progress of that relationship. And for me, reading psychotherapy stories can help me achieve this goal.
Can I give an example? Read the sentence below:
I had violated one of the fundamental rules of psychotherapy, if you have nothing better to offer and substitute, do not take away the patient's psychological defenses.
I think it is important to know, it is important to know and not to do this even in relation to your friend. that people's defenses are worth more than you think. Why? Because I learned that everyone is at war every moment, and I shouldn't make things worse for them. I must not allow myself to push them to the brink. And maybe doing this small thing is a big step for all of us...
In my work, I have learned that those who fear death more than others are those who approach death with a large amount of unlived life. It is better to use all life. To die leave nothing but dross, nothing but a burnt castle.
At the time of 21st Ardibehesht one thousand four hundred
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Yalom's approach in the stories of this collection is a different and risky approach in my opinion. The main attention is focused on the therapist's learning in the treatment process; That is, what the patient can learn to treat hunger. The main root of this way of thinking is also revealed in Mukharah, that Yalom wants to stand against the orthodox and mechanical reading of psychotherapy and offer a more dynamic method. The big danger is questioning the credibility of psychotherapy and considering it unscientific; A problem that is even mentioned at the end of the book. However, Yalom has tried to tell the facts and narrate both a lesson and a story for the reader
Regardless of the slow rhythm and the educational look of the beginning stories, although even the longest of them had many points to learn in the middle of the book, the two fictional stories at the end of the book were more interesting to me. Especially the final science fiction story, which had an interesting and different way of thinking, and maybe even for me it was unexpected to hear it from Yalom's language. In a way, Yalom proved that he is perhaps more capable of creating psychotherapy scenes and expressing their complexities in the form of fictional stories, than in narrating real adventures. And maybe his stories about Nietzsche and Schopenhauer are famous for this reason
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September 27, 2020
I don't know why I couldn't connect with this book, unlike the books I had read from Yalom. Maybe the topic was repetitive for me, or maybe it wasn't translated well, or maybe I wasn't in a good position to read this book.
I was
really upset that I could not get any connection with this book and reading it was a waste of time.
==
Momma And The Meaning Of Life: Tales of Psycho-therapy Kindle Edition
by Irvin Yalom (Author) Format: Kindle Edition
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This classic medium, first popularised by Freud and, more recently, by Oliver Sacks and Yalom himself, provides a fascinating insight into the human condition and our search for happiness. Contains six absorbing case studies which reveal the intricacies our psychological landscapes. Provides a fascinating insight into the human condition and our search for happiness. Explores the unique dynamic of the relationship between therapist and client. Absorbing and deeply thoughtful, Momma and the Meaning of Life is a work of rare insight and imagination.
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Top review from Australia
David Austin
4.0 out of 5 stars I love most of Yalom's work
Reviewed in Australia 🇦🇺 on 3 July 2015
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I must admit bias. I love most of Yalom's work.... he has a common sense style that is easy to access. This series of stories about Yalom's work with various clients provides a sense of the subtle ways in which some of the hidden rules we have in our unconscious can impoverish our lives and the strange pathways by which these are sometimes uncovered. Anchoring his thinking in four "dilemmas" makes for a helpful framework for the reader to navigate by. If the way that people are sometimes healed is of little interest to you then this is not the book for you.
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StevieB
5.0 out of 5 stars Typical Yalom..
Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on 23 September 2021
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Now if you’re a fan of Irvin D. Yalom you’ll enjoy reading his case studies and the pace in which his books flow from one study to the next.
Momma and the meaning of life is no different and Yalom gives a glimpse of his fascinating world and that of his cases.
There are six case studies to get your teeth into and Yalom in his usual way of storytelling doesn’t disappoint as you’ll find yourself mulling over each case with a sense of voyeurism as though you are peeking through a curtain while eavesdropping.
I read this on a long haul flight and found myself absorbed, which is no bad thing with a nice G&T for company..
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5.0 out of 5 stars What hold does your mother still have over you - analyse your dreams of her.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on 21 May 2020
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I was surprised that Yalom had issues about his mother who was dead but who still held a hold over his life that he examines in this book. It made me look at the expectations my mother had for me and now I too will examine my dreams about her - she is also dead- to see the hold she still wields in my life. It also looks at similar issues that have arisen from his clients. Always something to gain from reading Yalom's books and may clear up issues you didn't know you had, always a positive.
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S R Le Marquand
4.0 out of 5 stars Arrivd in good condition
Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on 23 September 2020
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Was easy to order and arrived in good condition. Arrived later than expected (due 9th came on 20th) but I didn't need it urgently so all was ok.
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4.0 out of 5 stars Truly insightful into human troubles.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on 8 September 2017
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Dr Yalom's books never fail to deliver insight into human concerns and fears about living the life as a human. Many insights cause the reader to reflect deeply into their own troubled and damaging thought patterns. Nothing is off limits with Dr Yalom's own life story and this adds credibility to his counselling room accounts and subnotes. Respect and value his writings and his professional observations.
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Marika Welstead
5.0 out of 5 stars 5
Reviewed in the United Kingdom 🇬🇧 on 15 December 2018
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An excellent introduction to modern psychotherapy from the person -centred perspective. Irvin is,a master at working with the here and now and reminds usthat the best work is always done when there is full trust by the client and the therapist.
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폴라와의 여행 - 삶과 죽음, 그 실존적 고뇌에 관한 심리치료 이야기
어빈 D. 얄롬 (지은이),이혜성 (옮긴이)시그마프레스2006-12-05
원제 : Momma and the Meaning of Life: Tales of Psychotherapy (1999년)
책소개
책에 실린 여섯 가지 심리치료 이야기는 얄롬이 직접 치료했던 사례를 기초로 한 것이다. 얄롬은 인간 심리를 대담하게 파헤치고 환자의 변화뿐만 아니라 치료자의 변화도 추구하고 있다.
'엄마와 삶의 의미'에서는 어머니와 유령과의 대화를 통해 가족 관계과 미치는 영향을 되짚어보고, '폴라와의 여행'에서는 어브와 폴라와의 심리치료 과정을 보여준다. '매그놀리아의 위로'는 고통받는 사람이 오히려 다른 사람을 위로해 주는 과정에서 변화하는 사람과 변화시키는 사람 모두에게 나타나는 효과를 보여준다.
또한 '일곱 가지 슬픔 치료 강의'에서는 치료자 어브와 배우자와 사별한 아이린이 긴밀한 소통을 하면서 함께 치료법을 찾아 가는 과정을 담았다.
목차
역자 서문
감사의 글
1. 엄마와 삶의 의미
2. 폴라와의 여행
3. 매그놀리아의 위로
4. 일곱 가지 슬픔 치료 강의
5. 이중 노출
6. 헝가리 고양이의 저주
작품 해설
작가 노트
책속에서
'나는 모든 것을 기억하요. 아래층에서 울리던 전화벨 소리, 빨간색과 하얀색의 술이 달린 내 목욕 가운, 전화가 걸려 있는 부엌 구석진 방으로 내려갈 때 철썩거리던 양털 슬리퍼 소리, 내 손에 부드럽게 미끄러지던 층계 나무 난간, 나보다 먼저 이 집에 살았던 하버드와 래드클리프 학생들의 손으로 이 나무 난간이 이렇게 부드럽게 되었을 것이라고 생각하던 나 자신을 기억해요.
그러고 나서 남자의 목소리, 앨런이 죽었다는 소식을 내가 놀라지 않게 알려 주려고 노력했던 그 낯선 남자의 목소리. 나는 구석방의 경사진 유리창을 바라보면서 몇 시간을 앉아 있었어요. 나는 지도 옆 마당에 쌓인 거무스름한 눈덩이가 무지개 빛깔을 띠고 있었던 것을 볼 수 있어요.' - 본문 118쪽에서 접기
추천글
이 책을 추천한 다른 분들 :
김형경 (소설가)
- 소중한 경험 (사람풍경 刊)
저자 및 역자소개
어빈 D. 얄롬 (Irvin D. Yalom) (지은이)
저자파일
신간알리미 신청
스탠퍼드대학교 정신과 명예교수인 어빈 D. 얄롬은 국제적인 베스트셀러로 알려진 『나는 사랑의 처형자가 되기 싫다』, 『치료의 선물』, 『비커밍 마이셀프』, 그리고 『니체가 눈물을 흘릴 때』 등의 저자이다.
최근작 : <죽음과 삶>,<입원환자의 집단 정신치료>,<삶과 죽음 사이에 서서> … 총 174종 (모두보기)
이혜성 (옮긴이)
저자파일
신간알리미 신청
한국상담대학원대학교 총장
이화여자대학교 명예교수
서울대학교 사범대학 졸업
미국 버지니아대학교 교육학 박사(상담자교육 전공)
서울여자대학교, 이화여자대학교 교수 역임
한국청소년상담원 원장 역임
저서
여성상담
삶·사람·상담
문학상담
사랑하자 그러므로 사랑하자
아름다움은 영원한 기쁨이어라
내 삶의 네 기둥
역서
쇼펜하우어, 집단심리치료
폴라와의 여행: 삶과 죽음, 그 실존적 고뇌에 관한
심리치료 이야기
카우치에 누워서
보다 냉정하게 보다 용기있게
어빈 D. 얄롬의 심리치료와 인간의 조건
매일... 더보기
최근작 : <문학상담> … 총 15종 (모두보기)
마이리뷰
심리여행을 떠납니다~ 새창으로 보기 구매
얄롬선생님과 함께 심리여행을 떠나보려 합니다~올해 첫 책으로 제 자신에게 주는 선물입니다~ 삶과 죽음, 그 실족적 고뇌에 관한 심리치료를 떠납니다~
나비의겨울 2013-02-18 공감(0) 댓글(0)
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소설같은 사례분석 새창으로 보기
여섯가지 정신치료의 사례가 나오는데 대부분 실제 사례에 근거했다고 하며 특히 몇 부분은 허구적 요소를 매우 적게 포함하고 있다고 한다.
죽음을 앞둔 또는 죽음을 애도해야할 환자들의 얘기가 나온다. 개인치료와 집단치료장면 모두가 소개된다. 두 가지 치료 모두 얄롬의 주장대로 지금 여기를 철저히 강조한다. 이야기중 남편과 사별한지 3년이 지났지만 여전히 힘들어 하고 있는 한 환자의 얘기가 나오는데 진정한 애도와 궁극적인 극복이란 무엇일까 많은 생각을 하게 한다. 단기집단치료에 대한 얘기도 매우 인상적이었다.
가장 충격적인 얘기는 다섯번째 얘기인데 치료자가 환자와의 면담에 대한 인상을 녹음한 테이프를 실수로 환자에게 전해주게 되어 환자가 모두 듣게 된다는 엄청난, 정말 생각하고 싶지도 않은 그런 재앙적인 사건이 일어난다. 치료자의 엄청난 부정적 역전이를 모두 알게된 환자와 환자가 그 내용을 알고 있다는 것을 모르고 있는 치료자와의 흥미진진한 면담이 뒤이어 등장하는데 끝내 환자는 그 사실을 밝히지 않지만 치료자는 자신의 역전이를 솔직하게 인정하며 환자가 치유되는 결론에 이른다. 지금 여기에서 치료자와 환자에게 일어나는 모든 것을 환자는 물론 치료자도 점차 인정하게 되며 서로가 치유되는 과정을 보여준다.
얄롬의 책은 읽으면 읽을 수록 깨닫는게 많아지며, 식상함과는 거리가 멀고, 두 번 세 번 다시 읽게 만드는 책이다.
- 접기
dr4mind 2014-08-21 공감(0) 댓글(0)
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