Monthly Meetings and individuals in Aotearoa/NZ contributed a significant sum towards the reconstruction of the Mito Meeting House in Japan, and this was sent to Mamoru Hitomi, Clerk of Mito MM, in 2011.
A letter has been received thanking us for our contribution:
Nobody could expect the dedication ceremony of our Meeting House and Kindergarten coming so quick! It was held on 9 September 2012, just two days before a year and half after the great earthquake on 11 March 2011. It was cerebrated by 130 attendants not only from our area but also Tokyo and much further.
Let me express appreciation to all the donors worldwide who have supported Mito Monthly Meeting to build a Meeting House and Kindergarten. The house is a joint house of the two. On weekdays it is a kindergarten and on Sunday it is our Meeting House. This system has been kept since 1951 when Edith F. Sharpless, a Philadelphia Quaker, started over again after WWII. 100 year old brick meeting house was replaced by wooden house, but bricks carefully taken out from the ruins were put on the walls up to the waist and on the walking space around the whole house. At the porch the kindergarteners placed each brick piece as their memory in July. Now they enjoy playing in the new house and out in the garden lively. Wood smells good in the hall under the tall triangle ceiling. On Sunday meeting for worship has been held comfortably. It might be impossible without your kind donation.
But I’m very sorry we have made you troublesome when you directly wanted to send us your donation because of our wrong bank account. That’s why some of your donation took a long journey through FWCC Section of Americas, FWCC World Office in London, FWCC Asia West Pacific Section and Japan Yearly Meeting, and to Mito Monthly Meeting. During the long journey personal donors’ names were not always clear, sorry to say. We thank each FWCC staff who worked for us often.
As our Meeting House and Kindergarten is a joint house, 1/3 of the building belongs to the Meeting and the other 2/3 to the kindergarten. The kindergarten is to be nearly half granted disaster subsidy from the government, but none to the religious body. That’s why your donation was very helpful for Mito Monthly Meeting
We cannot say thank you all directly, but let me send you much appreciation to all of the donors. Enclosed are the photos of the new safety and lovely house. We will be very happy if you could some day visit us and see our Meeting House and Kindergarten.
Games People Play: The Psychology of Human Relationships is a bestselling 1964 book by psychiatristEric Berne. Since its publication it has sold more than five million copies.[1] The book describes both functional and dysfunctional social interactions.
In the first half of the book, Berne introducestransactional analysis as a way of interpreting social interactions. He describes three roles or ego states, known as the Parent, the Adult, and the Child, and postulates that many negative behaviors can be traced to switching or confusion of these roles. He discusses procedures, rituals, and pastimes in social behavior, in light of this method of analysis. For example, a boss who talks to his staff as a controlling 'parent' will often engender self-abased obedience, tantrums, or other childlike responses from his employees.
The second half of the book catalogues a series of "mind games" in which people interact through a patterned and predictable series of "transactions" which are superficially plausible (that is, they may appear normal to bystanders or even to the people involved), but which actually conceal motivations, include private significance to the parties involved, and lead to a well-defined predictable outcome, usually counterproductive. The book uses casual, often humorous phrases such as "See What You Made Me Do," "Why Don't You — Yes But," and "Ain't It Awful" as a way of briefly describing each game. In reality, the "winner" of a mind game is the person that returns to the Adult ego-state first.
In the game entitled "Now I've Got You, You Son of a Bitch," one who discovers that another has made a minor mistake in a matter involving them both holds the entire matter hostage to the minor mistake. The example is where a plumber makes a mistake on a $300 job by underestimating the price of a $3 part as $1, so the plumber sends a bill for $302, the correct price. The customer won't pay the entire original $300 unless and until the plumber absorbs the $2 error instead of just paying the (undisputed part of the) bill of $300.
Not all interactions or transactions are part of a game. Specifically, if both parties in a one-on-one conversation remain in an Adult-to-Adult ego-state, it is unlikely that a game is being played.
Origins
In the 1950s, Berne synthesized his theory of "human gaming" and built on work fromPaul Federn and Edoardo Weiss and integrated results from Wilder Penfield to developtransactional analysis.[1] Transactional analysis, according to physician James R. Allen, is a "cognitive behavioral approach to treatment and ... a very effective way of dealing with internal models of self and others as well as other psychodynamic issues."[1]
Influence
In 1993, American therapist-turned-author James Redfield self-published The Celestine Prophecy influenced by the theory of Berne's human gaming. Specifically, the life games to which Berne refers in his book is a tool used in an individual's quest for energetic independence.
References
Berne, Eric (1964). Games People Play – The Basic Hand Book of Transactional Analysis. New York: Ballantine Books. ISBN0-345-41003-3.
The Celestine Prophecy is a 1993 novel byJames Redfield that discusses variouspsychological and spiritual ideas rooted in multiple ancient Eastern traditions and New Age spirituality. The main character undertakes a journey to find and understand a series of nine spiritual insights in an ancient manuscript in Peru. The book is a first-person narrative of the narrator's spiritual awakening as he goes through a transitional period of his life.
The book discusses various psychological and spiritual ideas that are rooted in many ancient Eastern traditions, such as how opening to new possibilities can help an individual establish a connection with the Divine. The main character undertakes a journey to find and understand a series of nine spiritual insights in an ancient manuscript in Peru. The book is a first-person narrative of spiritual awakening. The narrator is in a transitional period of his life and begins to notice instances of synchronicity, which is the belief that coincidences have a meaning personal to those who experience them.
The story opens with the male narrator becoming reacquainted with an old female friend, who tells him about the Insights contained in a manuscript dating to 600 BC, which has been only recently translated. After this encounter leaves him curious, he decides to go to Peru. On the airplane, he meets a historian who also happens to be interested in the manuscript.
The historian explains how the world is currently undergoing an enormous shift in consciousness, elaborating on how things had been generally understood until now: 1) at first people believed the world to be governed by the forces of divinity; everything could be explained as an act of a god or gods, 2) with increased knowledge of their world brought about through scientific inquiry, people turned to the men and women of science for an explanation of life and their world, and 3) without a satisfactory answer from science, people instead had them focus on efforts to improve their lives materially and subdue the earth, illustrated by a hyper-focus on economic conditions and fluctuations. What was now occurring, explained the historian, was that the baseness of current conditions was revealing itself in our souls. We had become restless and were now ready for another fundamental shift in thinking that would eventually bring about a better world.
He also learns that powerful figures within the Peruvian government and the Catholic Church are opposed to the dissemination of the Insights. This is dramatically illustrated when police try to arrest and then shoot the historian soon after his arrival. This forces the narrator to live a nomadic lifestyle amongst those wishing to bring news of the manuscript to the public at large.
The narrator then learns the Insights, one by one, often experiencing the Insight before actually reading the text, while being pursued by forces of the Church and the Peruvian government. In the end, he succeeds in learning the first nine Insights and returns to the United States, with a promise of a Tenth Insight soon to be revealed. The Insights are given only through summaries and illustrated by events in the plot. The text of no complete Insight is given, which the narrator claims is for brevity's sake; he notes that the "partial translation" of the Ninth Insight was 20 typewritten pages in length.
In the novel, the Maya civilization left ruins in Peru where the manuscript was found, whereupon the Incas took up residence in the abandoned Maya cities after the Maya had reached an "energy vibration level" which made them cross a barrier into a completely spiritual reality.
Redfield originally self-publishedThe Celestine Prophecy, selling 100,000 copies out of the trunk of his Honda before Warner Books agreed to publish it.[1]
The Twelfth Insight: The Hour of Decision (2011)[4]
Reception and critique
The book was generally well received by readers and spent 165 weeks on the New York Times Best Seller list.[5]The Celestine Prophecy has also received some criticism, mostly from the literary community, who point out that the plot of the story is not well developed and serves only as a delivery tool for the author's ideas about spirituality.James Redfield has admitted that, even though he considers the book to be a novel, his intention was to write a story in the shape of a parable,[6] a story meant to illustrate a point or teach a lesson.
Critics point to Redfield's heavy usage of subjective validation and reification in dealing with coincidences to advance the plot thus spending more time concentrating on the explanation of spiritual ideas rather than furthering character development or developing the plot in a more traditional manner.
Critics also point to improperly explained and, in some cases, completely unexplained “facts” as flaws in the story.[7] Examples of this include the author’s suggestion of the presence of a Mayan society in modern-day Peru, rather than in Central America, as well as the suggestion that the manuscript was written in 600 BC in the jungles of Peru, despite the fact that it is written in Aramaic. Another point of criticism has been directed at the book’s attempt to explain important questions about life and human existence in an oversimplified fashion.[8][9]
Im smiling as I remember the sweetness of
our connection at the NVC training - and wondering how you are going with
connecting with your son in a new way?
You asked about NVC being used in the
world in creating social change and peace, and I said I would come back to you.
I see this as a really important question as Im constantly asking,
"how can I contribute to creating a world where there is care for all
beings through our systems and structures" . Of course, the
contributions NVC has had often are not captured on video or recorded in an
article, but are part of a dialogue… frequently unrecognised within a worldwide
community… but still potent and having affect. So here are a few of the
examples of what is happening world wide in recent times (with people other
than marshall) that I AM aware of.
---
1. There is for me such an inspirational
documentary which was created in Nepal which was part of the reconciliation
from the civil war. There is a bigger program which has now flowed on
from this documentary. The link to that is… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqA2OydkXgg&feature=youtu.be
2. This is an outline of what happened to
bring a group of decision makers together to reform Minnesota’s child custody
legislation. Everyone believed reform had no possibility of happening to
this legislation as there was such diverse perspectives and because people had
become so hostile with each other. This change affects thousands and
thousands of families to create more peaceful families - the basic structure of
society. Miki Kashtan who headed this reform dialogue is an NVC certified
trainer who developed systems based on using NVC as the basis of everything she
does.http://baynvc.org/minnesota-dialogues/
3. Dominic Barter has been engaged in Rio
at a grass roots level, working in the favelas and directly with the police
force there. Here is an excerpt from an email he recently sent. The
work he has done there using NVC has reduced killings by large numbers by
affecting systemic systems through creating understanding and engagement.
Sadly, government policy has now changed and much of the work is undone
but still there were 100’s if not 1000’s of lives saved in the time it was
working. Here is his email…
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In the next few days and weeks many of you will see news
reports from Rio, and maybe wonder how this experience relates to the NVC work
we do here.
This article, published yesterday in the UK's
Guardian newspaper, gives a good summary of the situation as it relates to the
police. The article describes the very significant changes brought about by the
controversial, significantly flawed but nonetheless transformative programme of
Police Pacification Units in the city's favelas. From 2011 to 2014 I was
'orientor' of the mediation programme for the police in these units. This
involved basic introductions to NVC for hundreds of police, but mostly it
involved intensive accompaniment of them in their daily work as they patrolled
communities and worked in their makeshift bases. It also involved supporting
them in building different community relationships and creating what I call
'spaces safe for dialogue', with the systemic conditions necessary for offering
mediation and conducting Restorative Circles.
The article also describes how the significant
drops in death rates and the improvements in community relations were lost in
the years since. I hope knowing of both the changes and their recent loss can
help you in your work of illustrating the conditions that violence requires to
grow and to diminish, and in exemplifying to those you teach how NVC is being
used around the world.
Today and tomorrow you may see images from the
official opening of the Olympic Games. You're unlikely to see the thousands who
occupied Rio's most iconic music venue last night, or the many more who'll be
demonstrating for a more humane response to unmet social needs throughout the
day. Please keep such 'invisible' actions in your thoughts.
----
Sejin, This is a small smattering of what
I know and what I can quickly connect with to send you. But without
understanding and moving beyond our enemy images, I cannot see how any shift in
peace can occur - and our inherited language won’t help us.
I will call you separately to explore
attending the ENCT in October. To check it out, http://embodyingnvc.com/.
Blessings Sejin
Shari
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How did Rio's police become known as the most violent in the world?
Once in decline, killings by police in Rio de Janeiro are on the rise as the Olympic games approach
A UPP (Pacifying Police Unit) officer patrols in the Babilonia favela, which stands on a hillside above Copacabana beach, an Olympic venue site. Photograph: Mario Tama/Getty Images
Are Rio de Janeiro’s military and civil police really the world’s most violent? That is the conclusion of separate studies released by Amnesty International and Human Rights Watchearlier this year. They are accusing Rio de Janeiro’s police forces of routinely torturing and killing citizens – especially young black men – during arrest. They also say the problem is getting much worse as the Olympics approach.
The scale of Rio de Janeiro’s military and civil police involvement in the excessive use of force is chilling. And it is hardly a new phenomenon. In 2003 they were responsible for 1,195 civilian deaths across Rio de Janeiro state, most of them young black men. In 2007, 1,330 citizens reportedly died in the course of police action. These numbers are breathtaking when you consider that in 2015, across the whole of the US (a country with a population more than 50% larger than Brazil’s) an estimated 1,134 people were killed by police.
But those numbers don’t tell the whole story. In fact, although the situation is dire, overall numbers of killings involving police – “auto-resistance deaths” in the sanitised language of law enforcement – have declined over the past decade. Between 2003 and 2015 they actually fellby 46% across the entire state of Rio de Janeiro, and 62% in the capital. In 2013, for example, there were just 416 civilians killed. This is not to excuse the police – violence is intolerably high – but to put the statistics in historical perspective.
So what explains the long-term drop in police killings? Researchers first detected sizeable improvements after 2009 in the wake of a new police strategy in Rio de Janeiro. Auto-resistance killings dropped bymore than 85% in areas where the approach was introduced. The initiative consisted of newly trained pacification police units who were permanently deployed to many parts of the city, often for the first time. A key ingredient of the programme’s early success was the emphasis on rewarding reductions in violent crime.
Residents appear unconcerned during a police operation against drug traffickers in the ‘pacified’ Jacarezinho slum in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Photograph: Felipe Dana/AP
Unfortunately, these improvements were short lived. Starting in 2014, the numbers started creeping up. In 2014 there were 584 people killed during the course of arrest; in 2015, the number rose again to 645. So far in 2016, this upward trend continues. From January to May, 322 civilians were killed as a result of police interventions in the state of Rio de Janeiro, a 13% increase over the same period last year according to the state’s Institute for Public Security.
So what makes Rio de Janeiro’s police so violent? At least one reason is the officers’ personal exposure to violence, a taboo subject in law enforcement circles. A 2014 Stanford-University-led survey of Rio’s military police officers found that many experienced high levels of violence during childhood. Roughly 18% of respondents witnessed a homicide as a child. Another 25% were victims of a violent assault at a young age and 32% said they had a friend or family member murdered. It is widely known that previous exposure to violence can reproduce aggressive behaviour.
There are several other factors driving the recent spike in police violence. For one, the many political and economic crises wracking Brazil – and Rio de Janeiro in particular – are contributing to a spike in crime and significant reductions in spending in public security. The state’s public security budget was cut by more than 30% in 2016. As a result, innovative programmes – including UPP intervention – have ground to a halt. Police morale has plummeted,partly because they are rarely paid on time, if at all.
There is a real danger that Rio de Janeiro’s police resorting to the repressive tactics of the past. Brazilian police have a martial history. Before independence in 1822, law and order duties were the preserve of state-led armies. Reforms in the late 30s led to the creation of state-led police forces, though most retained their military culture. It was not until the creation of the 1988 constitution – Article 144 in particular – that military and civil police were subordinated to state governors.
It is easy to forget that before democracy in 1985 the military police served as the clenched fist of the Brazilian state. During the dictatorship, military police were regularly deployed to crush opposition and undertake clandestine operations, including targeted killings, disappearances and torture. Notwithstanding some reform, the legacy endures. The risk now is that with the crisis of policing in Rio de Janeiro, even the incremental gains could be lost.