Amazon.com: Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead (Audible Audio Edition): Brené Brown, Penguin Books Ltd: Books
Penguin presents the audiobook edition of Daring Greatly, written and read by Brené Brown.
Every time we are introduced to someone new, try to be creative or start a difficult conversation, we take a risk. We feel uncertain and exposed. We feel vulnerable. Most of us try to fight those feelings - we strive to appear perfect.
In a powerful new vision, Dr. Brené Brown challenges everything we think we know about vulnerability and dispels the widely accepted myth that it's a weakness. She argues that, in truth, vulnerability is strength, and when we shut ourselves off from vulnerability - from revealing our true selves - we distance ourselves from the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives.
Daring Greatly is the culmination of 12 years of groundbreaking social research across every area of our lives including home, relationships, work and parenting. It is an invitation to be courageous, to show up and let ourselves be seen, even when there are no guarantees. This is vulnerability. This is daring greatly.
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5.0 out of 5 starsMy Saving Grace from Toxic ShameSeptember 1, 2017
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Growing up in a household where obedience is won through criticism, belittling and shaming, it's little wonder I reached adult hood in a poor state of mind and body. With no self-esteem or confidence and full of toxic shame, I wasn't happy with myself in any shape or form. I truly disliked myself, and felt as if everyone else did too. I was a HUGE perfectionist, and very, very hard on myself.
Though I am still a work in progress (I'm 22 currently), I can look back and see how far I've come, and it is all thanks to Brene Brown: her books, her Ted talks, her program, etc. This is my favorite book of hers, though.
If you don't feel worthy of love and belonging, if you feel lesser than everyone else; if you can't forgive yourself for your mistakes or your terrible moments or the stupid things you've done in life; if you can't accept your humanness; if you can't show your face or eyes to others due to shame; if you can't own up to your mistakes for fear of judgement; if you compare yourself to others; if you constantly strive to prove yourself to others but feel as if you never measure up; then this book is for you.
I have read it through and then listened to the whole book about 3 times. I need to be reminded again and again what it means to Dare Greatly, as I have lived most of my life hiding and trying to protect myself. Every time I hear the words in this book, I can't help but say "Yes! Yes! Yes!" over and over again. It all makes such simple sense. I also cannot hear Brene's words - in book or talks - without crying, because they are some of the most beautiful words to my ears there ever was.
We are not in this alone, and our worth is not something that can be measured.
I am planning to get some of her books this Christmas for my family, who all badly need to hear her message and don't bother to look her up despite my urging. I will also have all her books on my shelf someday when I have kids, for them to all read as they are growing up, so that they don't grow up in fear, with low self-worth and full of shame, and to also give them the courage to dare greatly. (Of course I will parent differently than I was raised, and that will make a difference. ;) )
I would give this book a 10 star rating if I could.
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Virginia123
5.0 out of 5 starsThis book did an amazing job of helping me understand the difference between sharing ...May 23, 2017
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This book was life changing for me. I'd already read Gifts of Imperfection, and have been struggling with having healthy boundaries with a psychologically unhealthy parent.
This book did an amazing job of helping me understand the difference between sharing vulnerability in ways that lead to connection and over-sharing in ways intended to manipulate an audience - and why that oversharing has always led to disconnection.
For the men out there - I'd recommend starting with this book (rather than gifts of imperfection) as Brown broadens her research to include men here. And I really liked the way this book works through so many interesting topics and challenging scenarios.
One of my favorite parts is on professing love vs practicing love (below). It made me appreciate that when someone tells me they love me, then treats me badly, that it isn't really love at all.
<i>During a recent radio interview about my research, the hosts (my friends Ian and Margery) asked me, “Can you love someone and cheat on them or treat them poorly?”
I didn’t have much time, so I gave the best answer I could based on my work: “I don’t know if you can love someone and betray them or be cruel to them, but I do know that when you betray someone or behave in an unkind way toward them, you are not practicing love. And, for me, I don’t just want someone who says they love me, I want someone who practices that love for me every day.”</i>
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Heather Saffer
5.0 out of 5 starsSome people flip houses. This book will flip your life.June 25, 2013
Format: Kindle EditionVerified Purchase
Last week I was sitting outside a coffee shop reading a book on my kindle when a youngish guy walked by carrying a coffee and a computer, looking for a place to sit.
Since all of the tables were occupied and he was looking a bit displaced, I offered him a seat at my table. Relieved, he sat down and expressed his gratitude. I promptly went back to my reading but I could feel his eyes boring into me as I anticipated the dreaded question.
"What are you reading?" he finally blurted.
Now I know this is neither a profound nor earth-shattering inquiry but there were two problems at hand here.
One, I'm terrible at summarizing books. Just awful. (Which you're about to discover.) There's just something about the vast amount of information that I'm pressured to wrap into one or two sentences that completely overwhelms and paralyzes me.
And two, I was reading a book about shame and vulnerability. Which ironically, I was ashamed to admit for fear of being vulnerable. Clearly, I had just started reading the book.
Part of me was tempted to lie to youngish guy by replying, "oh, it's just some silly novel."
But then it occurred to me how shameful it would be to lie about reading a book about shame and vulnerability instead of just being vulnerable. Besides, as I'm sure it's obvious--I could use the practice.
"I'm reading Daring Greatly by Brené Brown. It's about shame and vulnerability and how shame can truly only dissipate by allowing yourself to be vulnerable", I quickly blurted.
Allowing myself to be vulnerable led Patrick and I into a conversation for the next hour. Patrick, if you're reading this, c'était une joie pour vous rencontrer. (If this is wrong I blame Google translate.)
This moment of unabashed vulnerability with Patrick was the beginning of a major shift in my life. And I have Daring Greatly to thank for that.*
I've always been one to be honest and open but Brene Brown's writing in Daring Greatly takes openness to another level.
She reinforces what I've known all along but been afraid of admitting--that vulnerability leads to happiness. Or as Brown calls it, "wholeheartedness".
And I, and maybe you too, could damn well use some wholeheartedness in my life.
We're living in a culture of `never enough'. I'm certainly feeling it. Are you? I never work hard enough, I don't help others enough, I'm not successful enough, I don't eat healthy enough... and on and on.
These thoughts of `never enough' turn into feelings of shame and fear. How do we combat shame and fear? By being vulnerable and expressing gratitude, according to Brené Brown. And now, according to me.
Following Brene's advice and expertise garnered through her research and life stories, truly does work.
It was the reading of Daring Greatly that prompted me to finally divulge my long kept secret of my history with an eating disorder; which wound up being my highest trafficked blog post of all time. As Brown explains, we're drawn to other's vulnerability but repelled by our own.
Are you living with shame? Do you always feel an underlying itch of `never enough'? Do you find yourself disconnecting from people you love? If any of these questions ring true then I hope you'll read this book for yourself. Even if they don't ring true, read this book. It truly is a game changer.
Buy It Right. This. Minute. Sit your butt down for an hour, and start reading. I promise you won't want to stop. I promise.Then come back to me and practice your newfound vulnerability. I'll appreciate and love every drop of the real you. And eventually, you will too. That's the truth.
[...]
*If you'll note the vulnerability here in that I'm attempting to review a book, despite my fear of reviewing books.
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Reid McCormick
3.0 out of 5 starsShame and its pathSeptember 6, 2016
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This is one of those books that seems ubiquitous. Everywhere I turned I saw Brene Brown’s book with the solid gray background and colorful letters spelling out Daring Greatly across the cover. Even more omnipresent are the book’s praises. There is an endless line of praises from acclaimed icons. Which is why I am shocked by my response: I found the book sort of boring.
The crux of the book is simple: shame, it is powerful and universal. We all have experienced shame. Most of us continue to carry the burden of shame and even throw it on to others. I can easily connect to the idea of shame. Every day is a fight beyond shame.
Pulling from the amazing words of President Theodore Roosevelt, to dare greatly is try something big; to live with courage. Taking the safe road while criticizing others is the easy road (and it is the road we see on social media all the time), but living a life of greatness does require some failures. We cannot be scared of failures. This is a concept we all need to grab hold of.
I only marked two pages in the book the intrigued me.
“Vulnerability isn’t good or bad…Vulnerability is the core of all emotions. To feel is to be vulnerable.”
“Hope is a function of struggle. If we want our children to develop high levels of hopefulness, we have to let them struggle.”
Perhaps I am a little late to the party and that is why I did not connect with the book like others. Perhaps not hearing her TED talk is fatal flaw on my end (she refers to her talk multiple times in her book). The information is good and grounded, but in the end the book felt long and arduous.
Sometimes I think an author and reader just cannot connect, it does not make the book bad or the reader poor. It is just an unknowable difference.
If you think I’m defending a book that I didn’t like, you are correct.
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W. Chef
3.0 out of 5 starsA big problem I have with this book is the author redefines "vulnerability" and then criticizing others for not wanting itOctober 18, 2018
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For some reason, the author intentionally tries to confuse the reader about what the meaning of the word "vulnerability" is, insisting that we accept her own definition instead of the one that we all know about: vulnerability by definition means exposure to possible harm or increased risk of attack. I looked hard for any other meaning and did not find it. She uses different definitions at different times in the book. For a researcher, this is very sloppy thinking in my view. This reminds me of Depak Chopra's abuse of the word "quantum" in his statements. If you redefine words to fit your own ideas, then of course you are going to meet resistance from people who use the words in the way they are intended and not your own weird way.
Here is an example of her weird logic at work. She says, "When discussing vulnerability, it is helpful to look at the definition and etymology of the word vulnerable. According to the Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the word vulnerability is derived from the Latin word vulnerare, meaning “to wound.” The definition includes “capable of being wounded” and “open to attack or damage.” Merriam-Webster defines weakness as the inability to withstand attack or wounding. Just from a linguistic perspective, it’s clear that these are very different concepts, and in fact, one could argue that weakness often stems from a lack of vulnerability”. Um nope. Weakness often stems from a lack of admitting your own vulnerabilities to yourself, or not sharing them with people that can support you with them. But weakness does not stem from a lack of vulnerability.
Here's another example. She says, “Vulnerability is based on mutuality and requires boundaries and trust. It’s not oversharing, it’s not purging, it’s not indiscriminate disclosure, and it’s not celebrity-style social media information dumps. Vulnerability is about sharing our feelings and our experiences with people who have earned the right to hear them. Being vulnerable and open is mutual and an integral part of the trust-building process.” Nope. Vulnerability is not defined by your mutuality and boundaries. It's not about sharing your feelings. These things can increase or decrease your exposure to risk, but they do not form its basis and it does not strongly depend on them. What does depend on them quite often is our FEELING of being vulnerable, which is often illusory and this delusion is not helpful.
At one point she seems to get it. She says, “the critical issue is not about our actual level of vulnerability, but the level at which we acknowledge our vulnerabilities around a certain illness or threat.” So which is it? She is clearly using the word "vulnerability" here in the normal accepted way. This is why I'm annoyed at her. She knows what the word means, but also wants to shoehorn this weird extra thing in there.
Because of this weird word abuse I find her book very hard to read. She should have said "sharing your vulnerabilities with people you trust" instead of "being vulnerable." Because the real problem is confusing the two concepts. Instead of furthering the confusion, it would be far better if she would clearly separate them.
So if you can look past this recurring semantic issue and read her intentions instead of her words, it's a valuable concept to understand and can help grow. That's the way I'm approaching the book. But I really wish she would use English in an accepted way and not blame readers for misunderstanding the Truth when they object to it....
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Anisha
5.0 out of 5 starsEngage with the world from a place of worthiness!June 2, 2018
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This book changed my life! I am an Engineer by profession, I live in a nice house and I am happily married to my best friend. To the outside world, it would look like I have it all. But I have been struggling with the shame, vulnerability, perfectionism, anxiety and the feeling of 'not enough' my entire life.
This book opened my eyes. It gave me a new perspective to my problems. The author not only says why and how these issues arises but also the tools needed to overcome it. After reading this book something in me changed. I feel calmer now, I started to forgive/love myself more, tell myself its ok to be vulnerable/imperfect and that I am enough.
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5.0 out of 5 starsStop Pleasing, Performing, and Perfecting! It's overrated and SPOT ON!!!May 17, 2017
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Thank you for Daring Greatly and writing this book. WOW is all I can say. The last chapter on parenting is a MUST read for any parents, new to the game or those who are looking for ways to reinvigorate their relationship with their children. I am not perfect, however I'm sure that I come across this way to numerous people. I realized that I really am a product of pleasing, performing, and perfecting! LMFAO.... This book has humbled me and I am sure that I will need to re-read it a second time. Though reading this book and doing more assessment of my life, I realized that my values have changed quite a bit. I value Diversity, Courage, Vitality, Compassion and Community. Best two take aways, are the feedback checklist and the Parenting Manifesto. Even if you get nothing else out of this book (which would be shocking) these are two pieces that you can sink your teeth into and guess what - I think that they are on her website too.
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roflol123
5.0 out of 5 starsEye OpeningJune 6, 2017
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Great book! I love Brene Brown and all of her research! It's very interesting to see how shame runs through cultures, homes, friendships, work environments, personal talk, etc. It's incredibly eye opening to acknowledge those things within yourself because once you do, you can't look at a certain part of life the same way when you see that shame was running the show the whole time.
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