ON THE BRINK OF EVERYTHING
BY PARKER J. PALMER
"As long as I draw breath, I want to be part of the solution." So says newly minted octogenarian Parker J. Palmer in On the Brink of Everything: Grace, Gravity, and Getting Old. Palmer's passion for better days shines through this series of essays (some old, some new). He looks back. He looks ahead. He never waffles or wavers. Palmer is delightfully honest as he assesses himself and our times.
Like age, the brilliance of Palmer's book crept up on me. I grew to appreciate this book the more I got into it:
Amen to his thoughts on public discourse:
Only by discussing our differences openly, honestly, and with civility can we honor the intentions of the framers of the Constitution who gave us the first system of government that regards conflict not as the enemy of a good social order but as the engine of a better social order--if we hold out our conflicts creatively. (124)
Gratitude for his willingness to share his struggles with depression.Palmer unhesitatingly sprinkles this dark period of his history throughout On the Brink of Everything. In doing so he models the openness, transparency, and quest to which he calls us throughout his book.
Amen to his distinction between job and vocation. The misunderstanding of the latter keeps from from surviving the loss of the former upon retirement. There are good words here for those approaching the retirement hurdle. (85)
Thanks for his wisdom and insight with respect to "The Accidental Author." As one who wants to sharpen the writing craft, these were invaluable words.
Palmer may be at his most culturally prophetic when it comes to racism and the toxicity of the current presidential administration. With respect to racism, he's quick to point out that he is not working penance over a guilt trip. He does, however, acknowledge "the inner roots of a social pathology that, if it goes unconfessed and unaddressed, will make" white middle class America a part of the problem not the solution. His ongoing frustration with our 45th President -- character and policies -- is no secret. We'll leave it at that.
While I appreciated so much of what Palmer addressed regarding white privilege and the rancid lingering effects of racism, I felt the author tended to generalizations with respect to "the privileged white class," and voters who elected Trump. That said, he calls out the "good old days" for what they are:
I urge those of you who cling to your dream of the 'good old days"--good for you anyway--to take a nice long name and dream on, dream on. The rest of us will stay awake and help midwife the rebirth of America, hoping that our national nausea in this moment is just another symptom that our country is pregnant with change. (p. 137)
Thoughts to ponder:
1. Embracing human frailty: Palmer is fond of quoting Thomas Merton who wrote, "Being human is harder than being holy." I think I know where he is coming from, though I disagree. Being holy is being fully human (that's Jesus' way). Still, I appreciate how frustrating that can be. Like Palmer I often want to give people the boot, or to borrow the line he does from "painter Walter Sickert, who once told an annoying guest, 'You must come again when you have less time.'" (149)
2. The hidden wholeness: Twice Parker Palmer quotes Thomas Merton: "There is in all visible things . . . a hidden wholeness." Palmer sees this hidden wholeness in the paradox of autumn, "diminishment and beauty, darkness and light, death and life." (167). I agree with both sages, but the Scriptures points me past the picture to the source: "For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities--all things were created through him and for him." (Colossians 1:16 ESV). Palmer's reflections lead me to believe he does not share that view.
3. Anger and forgiveness: I appreciate the line he shared from Anne Lamott: "Not forgiving is like drinking rat poison and waiting for the rat to die." (120). "Repressed anger is dangerous, a weapon we aim at ourselves that sooner or later injures others. But anger harnessed as an energy that animates social action on behalf of new life for all is redemptive." (120)
Palmer is at his most honest and (is this too strong) inept when it comes to death:
"If there's been a definitive statement on the matter, I didn't get the memo."
"The most important thing we can do to prepare for death is to show up as our true selves as often as we can while we have life."
"I don't know exactly where we go when we die, but the BWCA (aka God's Country) strikes me as the ultimate tourist destination."
"I'm certain of two things: when we die, our bodies return to the earth, and earth knows how to turn death into new life. . . . It matters not to be whether I am resurrected in a loon . . . a sun-glazed pine, a wildfire . . . or the Northern Lights and stars that lie beyond them. It's all good and it's all gold. . ." (180-1)
I find it interesting that Palmer, for all his angst with a broken world and all his efforts to right it, is content to say his piece and peace out as simply as a fleeting vapor. Palmer often gives a nod to his Christian roots. He rightly (in my mind) considers the applications of the incarnation for entering into a world wrought with troubles. He considers the implications of incarnation for getting into the mess of this world, but not for getting out of it. I'm not talking about an escapism, I want no part of that. But if God is concerned for entering into the fray does that not speak to an "incarnate" existential reality beyond the fray, one in which we too may participate?
Parker's quest, which we witness for 200 pages, suggests there is more to the end of our days than an extinguished candle and a whiff of smoke. He doesn't lead me there.
I appreciate Parker J. Palmer. His book, Let Your Life Speak, is one of my all-time favorites. On the Brink of Everything may not rank with it in my opinion, but this is good; these are words of one who has lived well, served well, and thought well. Sure, I don't agree with all he has written, but Palmer is the kind of "old guy" I want speaking into my life.
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Martha F.Dewing
5.0 out of 5 stars A bow to the authorReviewed in the United States on December 24, 2020
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I just finished rereading “On the Brink of Everything,” and I’m so glad I returned to it after the first read two years ago. Seeing it through the lens of 2020 brings greater meaning and depth to my relationship with it. George Floyd, a pandemic, ten months of isolation all deepen my interaction with Parker Palmer’s words. I’ve dog-eared pages, underlined and written in the margins. I never do that. With “On the Brink” I know that I will want to return to passages that have great meaning and imagine that when revisiting this magnificent work I’ll find the desired words of wisdom.
I know I'm reading something that is touching me deeply if I stop mid page, bring the book close to my heart, pat it and perhaps cry a bit because I'm so moved. This author deeply understands how precious life is and so I hug the book and by extension the author. The last time I did this many times over was with Greg Boyle's book “Barking to the Choir.” So grateful, so touched.
Palmer has a way with one-liners. I read a sentence, laugh, take it in and again hold the book close because he has touched something with sweet, sweet tenderness. I cry, sweet tears, acknowledging the humanity that is right before my eyes, in my heart.
Since September of 2019 I’ve embraced a practice. Upon waking and as I’m going from the horizontal position to upright and placing my feet squarely on the ground, I state, “I take a stand for awake dying.” And then I proceed with my day noting that I am consciously living my life as best I can from this place of acknowledging both life’s preciousness and the fact that I am going to die. It feels as though this book has been written with this practice in mind, and with every word Parker Palmer supports me. In my awake dying I am absolutely taking a stand for awake living, and I couldn’t find a better companion than Parker to walk me home.
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Vagabondage
4.0 out of 5 stars Thoughtful and worthwhile but a bit unfocusedReviewed in the United States on October 4, 2019
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I'm a longtime Parker Palmer fan, having had the privilege of studying with him in a week-long college faculty seminar some years ago. I've always considered him a mentor or fellow-traveler and respected his perspectives greatly. So as I'm almost his age, confronting the challenges the years bring most of us, and wishing to embrace this stage of life thoughtfully and with grace, I opened this volume with high hopes.
I consider the first part of it five-star Parker Palmer -- wry, frank, personal, reflective, wise, and definitely worth a read. But I have to say in all honesty that the latter part of the book strikes me as unfocused, a bit of a pastiche of excerpts from some of his in earlier books and online essays, and it began to disappoint me.
Perhaps this is an unfair criticism. I suppose as we age and reflect, we all do that: recycle thoughts, trying them on again to see how they still fit. But many of them in the latter part of the book seemed very loosely related to the book's announced topic of getting old. And though Palmer introduces each chapter with an explanation of how the excerpts that follow relate to each other and to the overall subject, I felt increasingly like I was following a beloved bird dog who kept losing the scent.
His political views are unapologetically partisan, which has put some reviewers here off to the point of setting the book aside. I think that's an overreaction, but I'm sympathetic to a degree. I happen to share his political views, which are deeply grounded in values PP has long reflected on and written and taught about, but I still found them distracting in this particular context.
So all in all, this title is a mixed bag for me -- highly recommended at the start, less so as it goes on -- particularly for fans like me who have followed Palmer's overall life work somewhat closely. I don't regret buying it, though, and will most likely reread it. Maybe I'm just getting cranky and impatient at my age, and may approach it with a little more patience next time I open it!
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Phil Haslanger
5.0 out of 5 stars An invitation to embrace the brinks of our livesReviewed in the United States on July 9, 2018
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Parker Palmer's new book, On the Brink of Everything: Grace, Gravity and Getting Old
might seem like something written for people dealing with issues of aging. But then, aren’t we all aging? If you aren’t, no need to read this book.
Yes, Palmer writes it as someone who has lived a deeply engaged life across eight decades. In this collection of essays, he not only looks at the opportunities still before him but he also weaves together the strands of his life that he has shared in so many ways and that have touched so many readers in his previous books.
It is a book of more than just essays. He includes some poems he has written as well as those by others that have had special meaning to him. One of his collaborators with him in preparing the book was singer/songwriter Carrie Newcomer, who wrote some songs based on their conversations and there are links to the work they have created and are creating.
The bookends for his wide-ranging reflections, though, not surprisingly, are the realities and opportunities of aging.
As he writes in the Prelude: "I'll be nearly eighty when this book is published, so it shouldn't surprise me that I can sometimes see the brink from here. But it does. I'm even more surprised that I like being old.”
What he does, as he writes, is turn “the prism on my experience of aging as a way of encouraging readers to do the same with theirs. We need to reframe aging as a passage of discovery and engagement, not decline and inaction."
One of the joys of reading this book is the wit with which Palmer writes. His last chapter is titled, “Over the Edge: Where We Go When We Die.” As he writes in the set up for the book, a good marketing ploy would have been “Want the answer? Buy the book.” His hope, though, is that as you read that chapter, “you’ll know where heaven is, thought I may be a little off with the longitude and latitude.”
Palmer takes his readers across the interaction of generations, the depth of a spiritual quest, the meaning of work, the value of curiosity, the importance of engagement with the world.
He is an graceful writer whose words flow easily off the page yet the words also demand that a reader take time to let them settle into our own interior spaces. Palmer relishes being on the brink of everything and invites us to find those places in our own lives.
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