INTRODUCTION
Awakening early, I rise and view a new day. Through my eastern windows, morning light slants across furniture and floor, casting pools of color upon my western wall. The room transforms in beauty—familiar, yet utterly changed. The world opens to me and I am again an infant, enraptured by a new creation.
The deepest needs are for the highest things. This book is a record of my hunger to know the highest things throughout my entire life, to awaken to the light that illumines all. In my darkest night, that light dawned from the East, reminding me of what I already knew, but had forgotten.
To rediscover what one already knows is the most intimate form of knowledge, like discovering in one’s pocket a treasure that was seemingly lost forever. In minor matters it is: Of course! I knew that! In deeper matters of the heart, it is the prodigal son returning, the realization that one is loved without reservation exactly as one is. For most of my adult life I had sought another kind of knowledge—aloof, comprehensive, general, a view from above: the universe seen from everywhere and nowhere. I sought this God’s-eye view in my chosen discipline of academic
philosophy, secretly hoping that if I achieved such an Olympian vision, I would at last find peace for my restless heart. That endeavor proved fruitless. Worse, as I searched through barren fields of bloodless concepts and came upon yet more unanswered questions, I lost touch with my soul.
Yet as defined in Greek antiquity, philosophy—philosophia, love of wisdom—still evokes my reverence. Wisdom is truth that nourishes, enabling us to be of greater service to ourselves, to others, and to all of creation. Socrates remains a hero for me.
Two primary kinds of knowledge are marked in many languages by separate terms: propositional knowledge, knowing that something is the case; and knowledge with a direct object, knowing as direct familiarity: "I know Paris—or Josephine, or the taste of a mango." I had been seeking the former kind of knowledge; what I secretly yearned for was the latter. To seek only propositional knowledge is to bypass the intimacy of direct awareness, or to recast it in unrecognizable formulas, content in the illusion that one can acquire facts while remaining untouched. Intellectual inquiry is then a cover for emotional cowardice—a state that I know all too well. When I open to the intimacy of direct knowing, I make myself vulnerable to transformation.
Religious practice seeks to heal the breach between propositional knowledge and direct familiarity, to recover from the illusion of isolation and reawaken to the many ways we are bound up with others and with life itself. As practice, it exemplifies a third form of knowledge—acquired skill or praxis, knowing how: Yes, I know how to play golf, or She really knows how to connect with people. Karen Armstrong, a respected, widely-read contemporary historian of religion, writes, Religion is a practical discipline that teaches us to discover new capacities of mind and heart.
¹ She observes that religious practice has the power to open us to a transcendent dimension of life that [is] not simply an external reality ‘out there’ but [is] identical with the deepest level of [our] being.
²Armstrong suggests that because of our misguided efforts to capture the truths of religion in fixed propositions, We have not been doing our practice and have lost the ‘knack’ of religion.
³ My own journey from abstract philosophy to Zen practice confirms this suggestion. Zen highlights the importance of knowing how; it is the cultivation of subtle yet powerful tools for living everyday life. To engage in Zen is to be constantly reminded that successful living is less a matter of accumulating information than of cultivating skills, and growing into what Aristotle called practical wisdom.
⁴Buddhism and Quakerism
Had I known where to look and what misconceptions to shed, I might have found within my own Quaker and Christian origins the very resources that my sick soul required. For many years, however, I could not see past my prejudices to the riches within my reach. In Buddhism I found a rigorous practice that brought healing balm. That discovery in turn threw unexpected light upon what I had failed to find in the familiar religious fixtures of my childhood—treasures that lay unrecognized at the center of my heart.
Reawakening to intimate awareness of my world, cultivating skills for successful living—these have been Zen’s most precious gifts to me. Cross-cultural affinities between Quakerism and Zen eased the way for this mutual
illumination. Some of these affinities are obvious: stark plainness and simplicity, deep silence and open receptivity are featured in both Quaker silent worship and Zen meditation. Others show themselves only upon deeper examination of the teachings of both traditions. Bodhidharma, the legendary first patriarch of Zen Buddhism, is traditionally credited with the following summation of Zen teaching:
A special tradition outside the scriptures;
No dependence upon words and letters;
Direct pointing at the soul…
Seeing into one’s own nature, and the attainment of Buddhahood.
⁵The fourth line refers to the experience of enlightenment (satori, kensho), often simply called awakening. Such an experience reveals to us that we have been living in a dull and troubled trance, oblivious to the vivid beauty of the world. Dogen Zenji, the great medieval Japanese Soto Zen master (1200-1253 C.E.), writes, To be enlightened is to be intimate with all things.
⁶More than a millennium after Bodhidharma, on the opposite side of the globe in 17th Century England, a feisty religious radical unknowingly echoed these themes. Of his great spiritual awakenings, George Fox (1624-1691) wrote, This I saw in the pure openings of the Light without the help of any man, neither did I then know where to find it in the Scriptures; though afterwards, searching the Scriptures, I found it. For I saw in that Light and Spirit which was before Scripture was given forth, …
⁷ His world was reborn: All things were new, and all the creation gave another smell unto me than before, beyond what words can utter. I knew nothing but pureness, and innocency, and righteousness… .
⁸ Fox wrote that in his awakened state, he observed a dullness and drowsy heaviness upon people, which I wondered at…and I told people they must come to witness death to that sleepy, heavy nature… that their minds and hearts might be on things above.
⁹ Fox did not come to these insights through ruminating upon religious teachings, but through courageous, unblinking surrender to the actual condition of his own life. He called such surrender standing still in the Light. This was the core of his spiritual practice, from which all of his ministry flows. Fox unknowingly echoed Zen: No dependence upon words and letters. Direct pointing at the soul.
To suggest that George Fox was a 17th Century English version of Bodhidharma would be a clumsy theological anachronism. Each man must be understood first within his own historical, cultural, and religious context. That said, the two figures display intriguing similarities. In paintings, Bodhidharma is typically depicted as a beetle-browed man of fierce, rough-hewn intensity. In later centuries, legends accumulated around him: He fearlessly asserted the futility of building Buddhist temples and of the recitation of the sutras… . For nine years [he] remained seated before the wall of a monastery… . [He] is said to have miraculously foiled his enemies’ attempts to poison him… .
¹⁰ Is it a coincidence that George Fox—another rough-hewn, singular figure, the man in leather breeches—often denounced the steeplehouses of his time (declaring that God did not live in temples made with hands
¹¹) or that by his own account, he was the target of numerous failed attempts upon his life, often making providential escapes from the clutches of his opponents? Like graphic depictions of Bodhidharma’s eyes, the discerning fierceness of Fox’s scrutiny of others was unnerving, provoking frightened responses: "Don’t pierce me so with thy eyes!
Keep thy eyes off me!"
¹² Like Bodhidharma, Fox pursued spiritual awakening with extraordinary intensity; he reports that in his early years of seeking, I fasted much, and walked abroad in solitary places many days, and often took my Bible and went and sat in hollow trees and lonesome places till night came on; and frequently in the night walked mournfully about by myself, for I was a man of sorrows in the times of the first workings of the Lord in me.
¹³ William Penn noted the utter uniqueness of Fox: He was an original, being no man’s copy.
¹⁴ The religious genius of both Bodhidharma and Fox drove them toward spiritual awakening, without concern for personal comfort and safety.
Both Zen and Quakerism lay claim to being distillations of the experiential core of their respective traditions, Buddhism and Christianity. (William Penn wrote a pamphlet about Quakerism titled Primitive Christianity Revived.
¹⁵) Both traditions abandon doctrinal definitions in favor of religious practices whose purpose is to awaken us to Presence in this very moment. Both point to a theological paradox hidden within our everyday delusions: we are always immersed in Sacred Reality—yet we remain blind to it. The classic 8th Century Buddhist poem, Sandokai (commonly translated as The Identity of Relative and Absolute) contains these lines: Reading words you should grasp the great reality… . If you do not see the Way, you do not see it even as you walk upon it.
¹⁶ Zen masters employ a startling array of means to cut through the obscuring thickets of words, in order to shock their students into an immediate realization of the great reality.
¹⁷The ubiquity of Divine Presence is repeatedly affirmed in Judeo-Christian scripture. Moses declares (Deut. 30:14) that The word is very near to you: it is in your mouth and in your heart… . The psalmist asks,
Where can I go from your spirit? Or where can I flee from your presence?
If I ascend to heaven, you are there; if I make my bed in Sheol, you are there.
If I take the wings of the morning and settle at the farthest limits of the sea, even there your hand shall lead me, and your right hand shall hold me fast.
(Psalm 139:7-10)
Jesus assures his disciples that I am with you always, to the end of the age. (Matt. 28:20) St. Paul agrees with a pagan poet that in God, we live, and move, and have our being. (Acts 17:28) and reaffirms Moses’ words, quoted above. (Romans10:8)
Although we are always immersed in Mystery, we live as if we were separate from it. Isaac Penington (1616-1679), a Quaker mystic and contemporary of George Fox who endured lengthy imprisonment for his refusal to abandon his religious convictions, put this paradox sharply:
But is it not strange, that thou shouldst be of it, and not be able to know and own it, in this day of its manifestation; but call the light which is spiritual and eternal (and gives the true and certain knowledge of Christ) natural? What! Of God, of Christ, (having received the Spirit, the living well) and yet not know the mystery of life within, nor its pure voice in this present day! But limit the unlimited One to a form of words formerly spoken by him!
¹⁸When Sacred Reality becomes a mere idea rather than Living Presence, we have lost our way. Concepts and words that should point beyond themselves assume a false reality of their own, limiting and even replacing that to which they refer—a category mistake that the philosopher Alfred North Whitehead called the fallacy of misplaced concreteness.
¹⁹ The opening words of the Tao Te Ching declare, The Tao which can be spoken of is not the eternal Tao.
²⁰A traditional Zen saying is, You may use your finger to point at the moon—but do not mistake the finger for the moon. When we view the moon with an open body and mind, we awaken to wonder and reverence, giving joyful expression to our experience. Eager to share with others, we try to capture the ineffable in words, using the tools that are familiar to us: symbols, metaphors, and rituals of our own tradition. For Bodhidharma and Dogen, that tradition was the Buddhism of their time and place; for George Fox, it was Christianity in 17th Century England. Yet for us, the spiritual power of their vision rests not in those outward forms, but in our intuitive intimation of the Mystery to which they point. As Paul Knitter writes, Christian language, like all religious language, is, in its entire vocabulary, made up of fingers pointing to the moon.
²¹The Primacy of Practice
When I stand some distance away from you, I may not be able to discern where you are pointing, nor comprehend why what you see evokes such wonder and zeal; only when I realize that my own standpoint is but one among many, may I begin to appreciate your perspective. Likewise, ministry that does not speak to one person may be exactly what another seeker needs to receive. A similar humility is required of us as we survey the immense variety and protean power of spiritual insights in countless cultural settings.
Yet how shall we make room for this seemingly laudable latitude regarding religious symbols without descending to a lowest common denominator, thereby arriving at tasteless spiritual pablum? As a boy I heard this question posed by elderly Quakers who were concerned about the decline of their beloved Society—usually accompanied by plaintive recitation of Matthew 5:13 (KJV): Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? It is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under the foot of men.
In my experience, generous respect for other religions is best grounded in deep fidelity to our own authentic religious practice. When I try to explain to others how I reconcile Zen practice with my Quaker and Christian identity, I am of two minds. If I compare theologies, lining up Buddhism and Christianity in order to read off similarities and contrasts, I fumble; my efforts to explain myself become forced and unpersuasive. Yet in my personal spiritual life, Buddhism, Quakerism, and Christianity meld seamlessly into my own singular journey. The beloved contemporary Buddhist teacher, Jack Kornfield, relates this story: One young woman who had become very involved in Buddhist practice returned to her parents’ home. She struggled with their Christian Fundamentalism for a time, until she sorted things out. Then she sent a letter back to the monastery stating, ‘My parents hate me when I’m a Buddhist, but they love me when I’m a Buddha.’
²²A fellow graduate student in philosophy once told me that his strategy in winning a philosophical argument was Distinguish and conquer. He was very skilled at doing this. Was it mere coincidence that his wife (also a graduate student in philosophy) seemed unhappy in the marriage? Buddhist teachings—and indeed, mysticism in all of its forms—observe that exclusive reliance upon discursive reasoning highlights differences, promoting division and discord. In contrast, when we return to the infinite depth and breadth of this moment, we rediscover our underlying connections with others and with all of life. Purely theoretical puzzles disappear or become irrelevant; as the Buddha delicately observed, they reveal themselves to be questions that tend not to edification.
²³A corollary of this spiritual insight is the paradox that we draw closer to one another to the degree that we become more fully ourselves. Thus I do not offer my reflections in this book as a spiritual map for others to follow. There is no one size fits all spirituality or religious identity; the shape of soul-making is unique to each individual. The Buddha’s final words were, Be a lamp unto yourself—that is, learn to recognize and commit to your own deepest insights. Again, George Fox unknowingly echoed this directive. Margaret Fell (1614-1702), the spiritual mother of Quakerism and the eventual wife of Fox, relates the moment when his ministry cut me to the heart: confronting a cleric who drew upon scripture to refute his challenges, Fox declared, You will say, Christ saith this, and the Apostles say this; but what canst thou say? Art thou a Child of Light, and hast walked in the Light, and what thou speakest, is it inwardly from God?
²⁴ I am of greatest service to others when I am true to myself: honest testimony from my own path proves to be more helpful than presuming to know what others should do.
God-Talk
The only real voyage of discovery…consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.
—Marcel Proust
²⁵My childhood home was suffused with a distinctively Quaker vision of Christianity, centering upon the spiritual and moral teachings of Jesus—especially the Sermon on the Mount. These teachings became etched upon my heart. Yet the conventional theological language in which they were couched gradually lost its power over my mind, replaced by intellectual skepticism and aimless spiritual longing. Zen practice became a new wineskin for that longing, refocusing my spiritual energies and freeing my use of Christian and Quaker language from the straitjacket of literalism. I count as one of Zen’s greatest gifts that it has restored to me the evocative power of Judeo-Christian scripture.
When I think of God, I do not picture to myself a disembodied, supreme Intelligence who can be persuaded by human supplication to intervene in the natural course of events. In the minds of many orthodox Christians, this admission will brand me as a non-theist or even an atheist. I choose not to invest energy in rebutting this charge. In my personal lexicon, the term God and its cognates hint at a Reality that is beyond the power of words to capture, a vast and potent Mystery.
²⁶Friends affirm that this Divine Reality is found within every human breast—that there is "that of God in every
one."
²⁷ Awakening to this Presence, we come to know the hidden unity in the Eternal Being
²⁸—our essential interconnection with one another and with all creation. Zen makes similar claims regarding Buddha-Nature, an empowering awareness to which we awaken through disciplined spiritual practice, revealing the truth of Interbeing.
²⁹ I hesitate to suggest that these phrases—that of God in every one and Buddha-Nature—refer to the same underlying reality. In view of the unique historical tapestries of Buddhism and Christianity, such a cross-cultural equation is dubious. Yet I personally find these phrases equally satisfactory in pointing to my own inner experience.
Because of fond memories of my childhood religious instruction, I continue to use some traditional Christian terminology. Yet I dissociate myself from the intolerance and exclusivity that often accompany this language. I invite readers for whom my Christian words and scriptural citations carry negative baggage to translate them into symbols that evoke their own spiritual insights. A guiding thread of theological reconstruction in these pages is to reclaim—for myself, and possibly for others—the power of Christian language, even as I respect, admire, and draw upon other great religious traditions.
The following chapters are linked by a common theme, the insights that arise as we awaken to the reality of the present moment. Breaking free of the conceptual cocoon that insulates us from our lives, coming to our senses, we discover that what Jesus called the Kingdom of God is indeed among and within us. (Luke 17:21) Moments of awakening are not always blissful or reassuring; they can be disconcerting, even devastating. Others are quiet reminders of who and where we are, small epiphanies that reorient us to what is most important. Their meaning may be lost on us in the moment that they occur, to be realized later in what the English poet, Wordsworth, called emotion recollected in tranquility.
³⁰Scattered through these pages are accounts of such pivotal moments in my life—personal parables, intense experiences that have shaped my perspective and directed my steps into the future. Some were traumatic, others uplifting. For emphasis, I highlight these accounts by the typographical convention of italics.
Unless otherwise noted, all quotations from the Old and New Testaments of the Christian Bible are from the New Revised Standard Version.
Chapters are organized according to the traditional stages of the mystic’s path: purgation (dropping all denial and self-deception, facing one’s brokenness and shadow self); illumination (out of such radical self-honesty spring moments of grace and insight); and union (the gladness of awakening to our intrinsic bond with all of creation).
Part I: Purgation
CHAPTER ONE: A Quaker In the Zendo relates the journey from my childhood in an Iowa Quaker farm family, through anxious years of academic striving that imploded into humiliating personal crisis—and to recovery through years of psychotherapy and Zen practice, returning me to a renewed engagement with my Quaker roots.
CHAPTER TWO: Standing Still In the Light draws upon the records of Quakerism, writings of George Fox and other early Friends, where I find—to my wonder and delight—explicit guidelines for spiritual practice that are often
overlooked by Friends today. I spell out these guidelines in experiential terms.
CHAPTER THREE: Pure Passion expands upon the theme of Chapter Two, linking the spiritual practice of standing still in the Light to an understanding of psychotherapy, meditation, and the Passion of Christ. Again my account is personal, building upon my own experience.
Part II: Illumination
CHAPTER FOUR: Living Peace details my efforts to understand the Peace Testimony of early Friends. I find it to be not (as is commonly supposed) the endorsement of a sweeping philosophical principle of pacifism, but rather, the outcome of disciplined spiritual practice. When we stand in utter sincerity in the Light, the causes of violence and hatred melt away, bringing us into sweet harmony with all of creation.
CHAPTER FIVE: Healing Gender Hurt explores the meaning of the Peace Testimony for gender conflict—especially what is often called the war of the sexes. I explore the meaning of masculinity in the light of Friends’ Peace Testimony. I share my own efforts to heal and to foster the healing of others.
CHAPTER SIX: Friendly Pedagogy traces the spiritual roots that nourish Quaker schools and suggests that the distinctive ethos of such schools derives from Friends’ unique manner of conducting meetings for business. I tease out implications of Friends’ spirituality for humane, effective teaching.
Part III: Union
CHAPTER SEVEN: In the Love of Nature draws from my childhood on an Iowa farm. In this chapter, I probe the contributions of Quaker spirituality to an overriding challenge of our time, the gathering storm of global climate change and environmental decay. We cannot hope to restore the earth while we ourselves remain alienated from her.
CHAPTER EIGHT: Joyful Service argues that the work of peace and justice—mending the world—is most effective when it is motivated not by indignation, fear, or anger, but by the transforming, reconciling power of hearts that have surrendered into the crucible of the Light. Reactive emotions may be necessary in order to cut through our complacence—but only love can overcome hatred and promote true justice.
CHAPTER NINE: Walking Cheerfully unites the themes of the previous chapters in a vision of reconciliation and redemption in this life—living the Kingdom of God in a broken world. If the deepest needs are for the highest things, what is highest can be found here and now, in this very life—if we have eyes to see.
While I draw upon fine scholarship from many sources, I do not write as a scholar addressing other scholars, but rather as an earnest seeker, sharing my brokenness, my failures, and my modest insights in the hope that my readers may find their way along their own paths to healing and wholeness, whatever those paths may be. In that spirit I write not only for those who self-identify as Quakers or Buddhists—but for all who yearn for the highest things.
Awakening to our own deepest springs of wisdom promises more than we can now dream or imagine. In the
final lines of Walden, Henry David Thoreau writes, Only that day dawns to which we are awake. There is more day to dawn. The sun is but a morning star.
³¹ His words are a departure point for the following pages. May the morning star—eastern light—reveal the true light, which enlightens everyone.
Karen Armstrong, The Case for God (New York: Knopf, 2009), p. xiii.
backIbid.
backIbid., p. xv.
backAlthough the importance of practical wisdom is emphasized in Aristotle’s Nichomachean Ethics (see Book VI, Chapters 5, 12, 13), courses in ethical theory and classical philosophy typically note this insight—only to put aside its cultivation in order to explore theoretical puzzles.
backSee Heinrich Dumoulin, S.J., A History of Zen Buddhism (Boston: Beacon Press, 1963), p. 67. Dumoulin dates Bodhidharma’s life to the early 5th Century C.E. and attributes these four lines to a Zen master from the Tang era, Nan-chuan Pu-yan (748-834). See Dumoulin, Chapter 5, ftnt. 1.
backShobogenzo; quoted by Jack Kornfield, A Path with Heart: A Guide Through the Perils and Promises of Spiritual Life (New York: Bantam,1993), pp. 332-339.
backJournal of George Fox, ed. by John L. Nickalls (London: Religious Society of Friends, 1975), p. 33.
backIbid., p. 27.
backIbid., p. 33.
backDumoulin, p. 68.
backJournal, p. 45. Fox refers to Acts 7:48: The Most High dwelleth not in temples made with hands.
backIntroduction by Geoffrey F. Nuttall, DD., to Fox, Journal, p. xxxiii.
backJournal, p. 9f.
backExtracts from William Penn’s Preface, in Fox, Journal, p. xliii.
backPublished in 1696. Available without charge online.
backSandokai, in Wikipedia, accessed on 23 August 2012.
backA traditional tool of Zen masters is a gnarled stick sometimes used in personal interviews to strike their students unexpectedly, in an effort to wake them abruptly into the moment.
backKnowing the Mystery of Life Within: Selected Writings of Isaac Penington in their Historical and Theological Context, selected and introduced by R. Melvin Keiser and Rosemary Moore (London: Quaker Books, 2005), front matter epigraph.
backAlfred North Whitehead, Science and the Modern World (New York: Free Press, 1925, 1997), p. 51.
backMany editions. This from Lao Tzu: Text, Notes, and Comments, by ChenKu-ying, translated and adapted by Rhett Y. W. Young and Roger T. Ames (San Francisco: Chinese Materials Center, Inc., 1977), p. 51.
backPaul F. Knitter, Without Buddha I Could Not Be a Christian (Oxford: Oneworld Publications, 2009), p. 65. Knitter is Paul Tillich Professor of Theology, World Religions and Culture at Union Theological Seminary.
backJack Kornfield, After the Ecstasy, the Laundry: How the Heart Grows Wise on the Spiritual Path (New York: Bantam, 2000), pp. 218f.
backQuestions Which Tend not to Edification, Sermon Number 1, from The Lesser Malunkyaputta Sutra, Translated from the Maijhima-Nikaya.
backThe Testimony of Margaret Fox Concerning her Late Husband George Fox, in Hidden In Plain Sight: Quaker Women’s Writings 1650-1700, ed. by Mary Garman, et. al. (Wallingford, PA: Pendle Hill Publications, 1996), p. 235.
backThe Maxims of Marcel Proust, ed. by Justin O’Brien (New York: Columbia University Press, 1948), p. 181.
backI have discovered that my outlook falls roughly into the category of apophatic theology. This longstanding tradition has its roots in negative theology (via negativa)—the outlook that no positive description is adequate to name or express the reality of the Divine Good. Negative theology… is often allied with mysticism, which focuses on a spontaneous or cultivated individual experience of the divine reality beyond the realm of ordinary perception, an experience often unmediated by the structures of traditional organized religion or the conditioned role-playing and learned defensive behavior of the outer man.… The Divine is ineffable… it eludes definition by definition. (From Apophatic Theology in Wikipedia, accessed on 23 July 2012.) Both Zen and the mystical aspects of Quakerism exemplify this outlook.
backFox, Journal, p. 263.
backIbid., p. 28.
backThis phrase comes from Thich Nhat Hanh, a Vietnamese Zen Buddhist master who has done much to popularize Zen in mainstream Western religious thought.
backPreface to Lyrical Ballads, Second Edition (1800).
backFinal lines of Conclusion. Many editions.
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