Beautiful Boy: A Father's Journey Through His Son's Addiction Paperback – January 6, 2009
by David Sheff (Author)
4.7 out of 5 stars 2,876 ratings
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—Now a Major Motion Picture
Starring Steve Carell * Timothée Chalamet * Maura Tierney * and Amy Ryan
“A brilliant, harrowing, heartbreaking, fascinating story, full of beautiful moments and hard-won wisdom. This book will save a lot of lives and heal a lot of hearts.” — Anne Lamott
“‘When one of us tells the truth, he makes it easier for all of us to open our hearts to our own pain and that of others.’ That’s ultimately what Beautiful Boy is about: truth and healing.” — Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia
What had happened to my beautiful boy? To our family? What did I do wrong? Those are the wrenching questions that haunted David Sheff’s journey through his son Nic’s addiction to drugs and tentative steps toward recovery. Before Nic became addicted to crystal meth, he was a charming boy, joyous and funny, a varsity athlete and honor student adored by his two younger siblings. After meth, he was a trembling wraith who lied, stole, and lived on the streets. David Sheff traces the first warning signs: the denial, the three a.m. phone calls—is it Nic? the police? the hospital? His preoccupation with Nic became an addiction in itself. But as a journalist, he instinctively researched every treatment that might save his son. And he refused to give up on Nic.
“Filled with compelling anecdotes and important insights . . . An eye-opening memoir.” — Washington Post
352 pages
Language
English
Publisher
Mariner Books
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Editorial Reviews
Review
"An honest, hopeful book, coming at a propitious moment in the meth epidemic." Publishers Weekly
"An excellent book that all parents can relate to whatever their children's situation." Library Journal Starred
“Those of us who love an addict — or are addicts ourselves — will find BEAUTIFUL BOY a revelation." — Martin Sheen, actor
"A welcome balm to millions…who thought they were making this journey alone."— Armistead Maupin, author of The Night Listener
"This book is going to save a lot of lives, and help heal…hearts." — Anne Lamott, author of Grace (Eventually)
“…moving, timely, and sobering. It’s also startlingly beautiful." - Sir Richard Branson, chairman, Virgin Group
“An extraordinary story of pain, perseverance and hope.” — William C. Moyers, author of Broken
“…honest, reflective and deeply moving. BEAUTIFUL BOY is about: truth and healing.” — Mary Pipher, author of Reviving Ophelia
"For…any one who has ever wrestled with holding on and letting go.” — Thomas Lynch, author of The Undertaking
“A masterpiece of description and feeling…immediate, informative and heartbreaking.” — Susan Cheever, author of Note Found in a Bottle
About the Author
DAVID SHEFF is the author of several books, including the #1 New York Times best-selling memoir Beautiful Boy. His writing has appeared in the New York Times, the New York Times Magazine, Rolling Stone, Playboy, Wired, and many other publications. His ongoing research and reporting on the science of addiction earned him a place on Time magazine's list of the World's Most Influential People. Sheff and his family live in the San Francisco Bay Area. Visit David at DavidSheff.com, and on Twitter @david_sheff.
Product details
Publisher : Mariner Books; First edition (January 6, 2009)
Language : English
Paperback : 352 pages
ISBN-10 : 0547203888
ISBN-13 : 978-0547203881
Reading age : 15 - 18 years
Item Weight : 9.6 ounces
Dimensions : 5.31 x 0.83 x 8 inches
Best Sellers Rank: #10,087 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
#22 in Fatherhood (Books)
#24 in Drug Dependency Recovery
#30 in Parenting Boys
Customer Reviews: 4.7 out of 5 stars 2,876 ratings
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Biography
DAVID SHEFF's books include Game Over, China Dawn, and All We Are Saying. His many articles and interviews have appeared in the New York Times, Rolling Stone, Playboy, Wired, Fortune, and elsewhere. His piece for the New York Times Magazine, My Addicted Son, won an award from the American Psychological Association for Outstanding Contribution to Advancing the Understanding of Addiction. It led to his #1 New York Times Best Seller, Beautiful Boy, which was named the best nonfiction book of 2008 by Entertainment Weekly. Beautiful Boy was also an Amazon Best Book of 2008. Sheff and his family live in Inverness, California.
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beautiful boy david sheff well written must read highly recommend family member beautifully written great book loved ones heart wrenching point of view crystal meth substance abuse nic sheff great read roller coaster drug use journey through his son high school opened my eyes
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Jacqueline Gollnick
5.0 out of 5 stars An addict's point of view
Reviewed in the United States on March 28, 2016
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Well, I'm addicted to methamphetamine. I've been in recovery for one year, 3 months, and 11 days. When I was released from jail one year ago, I decided to read Tweak. An old friend of mine read it while he was in juvie, that's how I first heard about it. Tweak was relatable to me, and so was We All Fall Down. Nic Sheff is an amazing person, he had overcome a lot. He inspires me.
So when I found out that his father also wrote a book about his son's addiction, I just had to have it. Let me tell you, Beautiful Boy tore me apart. I've only experienced life from the point of view of someone on meth. I thought I was being considerate, I always checked in with my family on a weekly basis. I was home at least twice a week. I worked full time, but still liked to go crazy with my friends. After reading this book (okay, while reading it) I cried and apologized to my parents, my grandparents, and my uncle for all the hell I had put them through. I honestly had no clue that I was hurting people so badly.
If you're an addict, if you have a child that is an addict, even if you're neither, READ THIS BOOK.
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Kyle Conner
2.0 out of 5 stars Disingenuous
Reviewed in the United States on May 21, 2019
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I’m bitter about it. I know. It’s awful of me to say these things, but my initial positive reaction to this book is hampered by the fact that it’s essentially about a severely addicted individual, who grew up in, and has maintained even after sobriety, a life of privilege. Drug and alcohol addiction is an un-biased monster. It affects all walks of life. I know this. It’s just, to be frank, irritating to hear about a young white male of high socioeconomic standing, manage to be so thoroughly privileged during (and subsequently following) such dark years, when there are stories out there of people (due to their lesser social stations) who don’t have the advantages that Nic does... and especially don’t have the connections that lead them book deals and careers working in television.
Not to say that Nic, who now allegedly lives a drug and alcohol-free life, should have wound up impoverished and working menial jobs... but I cannot get over the fact that, yes, his family has money, and they continue to take in money, and Nic himself has even managed to draft his own bestselling memoir (among other novels), and has even written movie reviews (my dream job!) for highly mainstream publications, and for popular television.
And I understand there is no choice in how you grow up— whether it be wealthy or paycheck-to-paycheck. But Nic’s family made some mistakes that only exist in the bourgeoisie world of theirs: You do NOT allow a hardcore drug addict to move thousands of miles away to live with (another) privileged family you know, and then purchase said drug addict an apartment in BROOKLYN where they can essentially shoot up in peace. What happened to tough love? Just another young, rich white guy living off mommy and daddy in NYC, except with a terrible meth habit. It’s sad, and it’s counter-productive. Soon enough, though, the situation and emotions catch up with them: the resounding, numbing resignation to their son’s plight, as well as their own. They finally realize it’s best to cut him off financially, and offer no outs but rehabilitation. You cannot help someone who does not want to help themselves— every case isn’t going to be like any other, but it mainly boils down to that. I’m a sober adult living maybe not my best life, but a clean life. And I’m content. The particulars of my story are different, but the overall ugly truths are not. Nic has, again, opportunities that far exceed most.
On the writing:
David Scheff’s writing is resoundingly concrete and concise, but oftentimes dull and redundant (much like the stages of his son’s addiction: cyclical and repetitive in terms of rehab, relapse, rehab, relapse etc. etc.). There were many times, too, where I found him a bit self-congratulatory; attempting to come off as a hip father: frequently mentioning indie/cool bands and hipster films, as if there was some weird kind of pride behind his telling the reader of this. I get it. You don’t need to incessantly reference reading The New Yorker, and Wes Anderson, and camping trips to Big Sur, or jetting around the world for vacations. It instills a message of disingenuous smugness, even if only meant in a harmless way. Something else to point out: The book itself is overlong. What started as an article in a newspaper, grew into a story that was stretched far beyond its own parameters, in what felt like an effort to fill pages. 80% of the book was, for me, uninspiring any emotions. The last 20% eventually evolved into one of strong emotion and familial struggle, through Nic’s continued addiction and (Fifth? Sixth?) recovery process. Within those final 80-or-so pages, I felt David’s hurricane of emotions quite viscerally: grief and pain, hope and disappointment, anxiety and numbed-out grave acceptance that his life, and that of his son’s, will forever be a seesaw of addiction and recovery, where the former may be a few months and the latter a few years, or a couple of days and a decade.
And I’ll say this: I’m so happy Nic continues to work on abating his addiction— and I say “continues”, because it’s an ongoing process, and he’ll be in recovery for the rest of his life. You mentally never stop being an addict; you only stop physically being one. This is a story that, even with its flaws, is one worth telling. There are many valuable insights here— for parents, brothers and sisters, friends, spouses, and children of addicts. The drug epidemic in America is just that: an epidemic! The author writes that “Addiction is America’s deep, dark secret”, and that’s damn accurate. I don’t know of any one person that hasn’t dealt with addiction in one way or another— a family member, a friend, a child, a lover, themselves. It’s killing us; it’s taking over and destroying the youth of this country. Because, let’s face facts, teenagers and young adults are using more and more since the early aughts. We hide it under rugs and behind closed doors most of the time, but it’s there. Drugs have been, and will continue to be, a major problem in the United States, and I’m glad that there is renewed interest in memoirs such as David and Nic Scheff’s (because of the film adaptation) for the sole reason that it’s bringing the addiction crisis back into the mainstream.
I’ll end with this: More needs to be done to combat/treat the disease. Until the war on drugs in this country is won (or made somewhat less catastrophic), we can strive to erase the stigma against addicts and recovering addicts, and help the populace that is in recovery by supporting them however we can and for as long as we can.
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5.0 out of 5 stars This was an amazing, touching book told from the other side of ...
Reviewed in the United States on February 11, 2017
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This was an amazing, touching book told from the other side of addiction - a side not heard very often - the side of a parent watching their child slowly spiral out of control due to addiction.
As a recovering addict myself, (13 yrs., 11 mos., 11 days), as well as a parent, it was really hard for me to read at times but I'm SO glad I did.
This is an amazingly touching book that is at times funny, emotional, heart wrenching, and hopeful. I would recommend this to book to everyone but especially to those struggling with either side of addiction.
93 people found this helpful
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L Weiss
1.0 out of 5 stars One of many self-serving books
Reviewed in the United States on November 25, 2018
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A self serving dribble of a book. He cheats on his wife with her best friend, makes his son at five years old fly by himself, smokes pot with his son and then wonders why he is a drug addict. Of course, in order to make the book longer we get lectured on how difficult it is to stop, and all the data and opinions that allow this father to think he was not responsible. Don't waste your money. This book is just a do-over of so many others.
46 people found this helpful
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sobryan
5.0 out of 5 stars Power story about a family's struggle with addiction
Reviewed in the United States on October 19, 2018
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This memoir should be required reading for families, friends, educators - anyone who might be touched by another person's addiction to drugs or alcohol. David Sheff doesn't mince words nor does he try to hide behind as he recounts his family's struggles to help son Nic battle a methamphetamine addiction.
Sheff writes with honesty as he experiences a full range of emotions - sadness, happiness, guilt, hope, grief - you know it and he has experienced it. Not only are emotions laid bare, but so are the facts about meth addiction, the search for treatment and the truth about long-term damages and effects. The author has interviewed many, many experts and researchers in his quest to understand what drives a person to addiction, what chances there are for a recovery and what needs to be done to get a handle on this epidemic.
And epidemic it is. Opioids are in the headlines these days, but meth is drug that keeps on killing. It changes the user's brain, body and soul. Sheff has seen first-hand what the drug has done to his son, and his story is one that way too many families are experiencing, too.
The memoir is being made into a movie, but I urge readers to experience this story in its truest form - the written word - before seeing the movie.
As a companion read, check out Nic Sheff's memoir of his addiction. I haven't read it yet, but it's next on my list.
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JaquiP
4.0 out of 5 stars An uncomfortable book to read ..... Full of facts and insight about substance abuse ....and Family...
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 11, 2019
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The last book as medically detailed and sad as this I read was The Radium Girls ... This story of a talented, golden child, athletic, clever, dearly loved but addicted, told from his father's perspective is compelling searching and moving in the extreme. I recently did an online university course called understanding drugs and addiction and I am glad I did as this helped me with the medical implications and details threaded through this book which are explained and explored in Great detail and depth as David Sheff seeks to understand what is happening to his much loved son, mentally physically and emotionally. Also the impact on his family immediate and scattered and his heartbreak as he seems to understand and wonder if it is his fault. Lots of questions, lots of disturbing statistics and scenes. It is multi layered and graphic and disturbing and not an easy book to read. No quick fixes, no answers, no miracles on this journey, but hope and love in a world that often reads as idyllic a place for children to be reared but pernicious drugs easily accessed hover as temptation in paradise. It's a disturbing and challenging read as The Radium Girls was I found. I am not sure if I exactly enjoyed reading it, I stopped and started
A few times but it was certainly moving and compelling.
7 people found this helpful
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Em
5.0 out of 5 stars Everyone should read!
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 16, 2019
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An incredibly sad, harrowing and depressing book to read, but also an absolutely essential read. This is a very honest and raw account of the manner in which lives are turned upside down, ruined to some extent, and the depths of despair that accompany this when a member of the family becomes a drug addict with no reasoning. I have some awareness of drugs, but not to this extent and it both scared and educated me. Thank you David for being so honest and truthful and for having the strength to look at yourself so bravely and share with us all. I have no doubt that the prayers were what was needed and I am so heartened that soul played a huge role in how the story unfolded and continues to unfold. There is hope.
6 people found this helpful
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Kindle Customer
4.0 out of 5 stars An engrossing, but often irritating, read.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on August 21, 2019
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Sometimes the picture the author paints of his son seems a little whiter than white, both before and during his battle with addiction (in the periods when Nic is sober and sane) which, for me, detracted from the tale. Can't an average child from an average family suffer, and cause suffering, on the same scale? Sometimes there is the undercurrent that if Nic hadn't been stricken with the affliction of addiction the he would have cured cancer and brought peace to the Middle East. That said, the descriptions of the insidiousness of addiction and the monstrous effect it has on the addict and the how the poison from the fallout seeps into the family are intense, harrowing and moving.
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Christina
4.0 out of 5 stars Poignant, cautionary, well-written
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on March 22, 2019
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Beautiful Boy unfurls a father’s journey to understanding that the greatest love he can offer his drug-addicted son, and himself, is though letting go of all that he believes is essential to being a father. How do we live with our children’s terrible decisions? How to we love our kids and hate what they do to themselves and to us? How do you love someone unconditionally yet find that they don’t love you the same way? And what if, despite being the best parent you knew how to be, your missteps have contributed to the devastation of those you love the most, those for whom you were entrusted to care?
Any parent will find an emotion/reaction/behavior to which they can relate in Beautiful Boy, even if your family is stable. This is a poignant story of a man who never gave up on his son, but had to learn how to love him differently in order to protect himself.
I have not seen the movie. How ironic that at ten years old this book presaged the devastation addiction crisis has wrought in the US today.
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Shakira Richardson
2.0 out of 5 stars Started off interesting and then...
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on July 31, 2019
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It went on and on and on. I understand that drug addiction has its ups and downs, much like this book, and I understand it's a true account, but somewhere near the middle I really didn't care about Nic's story anymore.
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